@thegavinvanwinkle: The only time I feel safe… #fyp #lightsout #party. @🧼CH4Z🅿️ @Timmy Ruble125

TheGavinVanwinkle
TheGavinVanwinkle
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Region: US
Saturday 25 June 2022 00:38:39 GMT
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user_o426
ur mom :
jeremiah fisher?
2022-06-25 05:15:49
3327
gabbimosca
gabbi 💌 :
jeremiah????
2022-06-25 05:23:47
101
jane.elizabeth_
jane :
i need co workers like this🧍🏼‍♀️mine show up late all the time and don’t talk to anyone
2022-06-25 01:42:23
6840
meredithaw
meredith🤸🤸 :
lifeguards rise up
2022-06-25 03:09:23
582
thegavinvanwinkle
TheGavinVanwinkle :
Should we make a pt. 2??
2022-06-25 20:24:38
408
gracieolo
Grace Olovich :
yes lifeguard take over this summer
2022-06-25 05:33:05
640
spencejm
Spencer ❤️ :
Ugh fine I’ll take them all
2022-06-25 17:16:42
62
asoliz7
ꕤ abrianna ꕤ :
i want the white one w blue glasses por favor 🙏😋
2022-06-25 01:34:08
44
morganhalllll
morganhall :
THE WAC IS FAMOUS 🤪🤪🤪
2022-06-25 02:04:54
668
madison.millzzz
Madison :
we’re cool
2022-06-25 02:17:17
33
aamy_yang
Amers :
idkk guys smt about this somg mashup and the vibes are just HITTINNGGG
2022-06-28 01:21:03
7
chaz.amodeo
chaz🧼 :
feelin famous today‼️
2022-06-25 01:54:46
175
hudsonbrookhart
Hudson :
Some kid is drowning
2022-06-26 02:56:39
135
abbyjordanb
Abby Bergman :
Which one of u is Jeremiah
2022-06-27 03:02:52
29
that.silver.2ndgen
that.silver.2ndgen :
What’s happens when they go on lunch break😂😂😂
2022-06-26 20:41:09
14
maggiemcgrenra
maggiemcgrenra :
Imagine being on stand during this and missing the vid
2022-06-26 04:00:45
5
samgii00
Samggio :
el vato rojo jajajajaja
2022-07-31 19:08:47
10
ahmed_cheena02
Ahmed 💫 :
Valid
2022-06-26 01:12:39
5
jakeplayslax
Jakeplayslax :
So this is what happens when they leave while I’m asking for help cuz I’m drowning
2022-06-27 12:16:42
5
gretchenwilms
gretaw🙈🙈🙈🙈 :
so umm WHO is the first boy???????
2022-06-25 04:16:37
49
sam_davis_17
sam_davis_17 :
🛟
2022-06-26 03:51:18
5
keeveon.c.h
Keeveon.C.H :
song?
2022-06-26 10:47:47
5
wesley.barnette
trapbarny :
W life squad
2022-06-26 06:47:47
5
robloxstoriessomearemine
Don’t take offense :
the one kid trying to film a fight 👴😭
2022-06-29 02:53:24
5
ethan_freeman
Ethan :
Gos i love being a lifeguard
2022-06-26 04:13:10
5
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would not stop is the phrase i want to pull apart because it is precise in a way that spiraling alone is not. not could not stop, which would be passive, which would put the spiral in charge entirely. would not. which has will in it. which has a quality of intention to it that feels wrong when you are in a spiral because intention implies something you could negotiate with and the spiral does not negotiate. and yet would not is exactly right because the spiral at 3am in the silence has a quality of deliberateness to it that could not does not capture. it feels chosen. not by you. by something in you that has decided tonight is the night to surface every unfinished thought and unresolved fear and unanswerable question that has been waiting for a quiet room and an unguarded mind. and 3am with a baby who is not sleeping is the quietest room and the most unguarded mind and the spiral recognizes this and arrives with everything it has been holding and would not stop is the only accurate description of what it does next. and the thing about a would not stop spiral in a silent room at 3am is that it has the whole room to expand into. silence and space are what it needs and it has both and there is nothing to interrupt it and you have tried everything you can think of to interrupt it and none of it has worked because interruption requires something real to hold onto and at 3am alone in the silence there is nothing real enough to compete with the spiral's version of reality. and then the dots. and the dots are real. realer than the spiral. something actual to hold onto while the would not stop does what it does. and real things interrupt spirals in a way that nothing internal can.  #postpartum #newmom #momtok #momlife #postpartumjourney
would not stop is the phrase i want to pull apart because it is precise in a way that spiraling alone is not. not could not stop, which would be passive, which would put the spiral in charge entirely. would not. which has will in it. which has a quality of intention to it that feels wrong when you are in a spiral because intention implies something you could negotiate with and the spiral does not negotiate. and yet would not is exactly right because the spiral at 3am in the silence has a quality of deliberateness to it that could not does not capture. it feels chosen. not by you. by something in you that has decided tonight is the night to surface every unfinished thought and unresolved fear and unanswerable question that has been waiting for a quiet room and an unguarded mind. and 3am with a baby who is not sleeping is the quietest room and the most unguarded mind and the spiral recognizes this and arrives with everything it has been holding and would not stop is the only accurate description of what it does next. and the thing about a would not stop spiral in a silent room at 3am is that it has the whole room to expand into. silence and space are what it needs and it has both and there is nothing to interrupt it and you have tried everything you can think of to interrupt it and none of it has worked because interruption requires something real to hold onto and at 3am alone in the silence there is nothing real enough to compete with the spiral's version of reality. and then the dots. and the dots are real. realer than the spiral. something actual to hold onto while the would not stop does what it does. and real things interrupt spirals in a way that nothing internal can. #postpartum #newmom #momtok #momlife #postpartumjourney

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