@patrickteahanofficial: All of my clients, including myself, tried in some way to get their family to be aware of abuse. ⠀ ⠀ As children, we might do that by:⠀ ⠀ *hiding *shutting down *acting out ⠀ *or even directly saying things like, "Does dad have to come on this trip?" ⠀ ⠀ We were showing big signs - even if there were no healthy adults to pick up on them. All abused children show these signs, even if you don't remember doing that. ⠀ ⠀ But as adults, when we start making connections about our trauma to the family system, we try to get a sibling to get it, or we try to reach out to that cousin who had the same sexually-off grandparent. ⠀ ⠀ We might even try to get the "safer" parent to acknowledge or understand on some level about the emotional, physical or sexual abuse we experienced. How did that go if you tried?⠀ ⠀ We are just doing what is natural to a human being, which is to think family is the safe place. It's a huge reckoning when we learn that it's not. ⠀ ⠀ When clients talk about their experience doing this with their family, they ended up invalidated at best and attacked via shame at worst. ⠀ ⠀ After, they struggle with self-doubt and loneliness. That's part of the process -seeing our family system for what it is. I relate. This was my experience too.⠀ ⠀ If you are in this or experienced it this way, know that it's one of the expected issues that comes with healing from childhood trauma. It is extremely rare that I have clients with ANY safe people in their family system who can hear, validate, be accountable, or be present about what happened to you. ⠀ ⠀ We learn about what the system really is when we tell the truth or try to connect about the abuse. It's both immensely painful and revealing at the same time. ⠀ ⠀ What do you think? Check out my Monthly Healing Community - Link In Bio! ⠀ #childhoodtrauma #innerchild #healing #cptsd #trauma #familysystems #toxicfamily #shame #truth

Patrick Teahan

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Region: US

Saturday 26 August 2023 12:05:00 GMT