@amylissx: Truth is.. nobody should hear the words ‘there is no heartbeat’ at 36 weeks pregnant. But I did. I thought starting a new career with my dream company 3 months after my baby died would distract me from my grief. I had a nervous breakdown. I then held every single hope on having another baby. I crumbled every single month when the test said negative for 17 months. I thought being pregnant would take the pain away, it was the most terrifying 9 months of my life. Knowjnf being pregnant, even at the end, didnt mean my baby would come home. I thought bringing my rainbow baby home would somehow heal my heart.. & it did. But it also breaks my heart every day watching Bear grow up knowing he should have a 2 year old big brother to giggle at & play with. . My grief changes daily. It hasn’t got easier. It’s just changed, adapted with me. I’ve learnt nobody will ever understand. But thats ok. I don’t need them to. It’s my grief, my life & my story. And most importantly, it’s my wish that nobody else does ever have to fully understand. Because I wouldn’t wish this pain on anyone. #lifeafterloss #babyloss #babylossawareness #babylosscommunity #stillbornstillloved #stillborn #stillbornmommy #babylossmama #grief #griefjourney #griefandloss #griefsupport #blaw #barney #myson #somedaysareharder #livingafterloss
