@lauren_larusso: Want to know why affairs are so powerful, why they change our brains and our lives the way they do? Here’s what’s at work: 1️⃣ Variable Interval Schedule of Reinforcement: This is the most powerful reinforcement and reward schedule that can be used to influence behavior. The nature of an affair means that reinforcement is delivered at varying and unpredictable time intervals. Since we don’t know when the reward will occur (a text, a meetup, a gift, an email, whatever the reinforcement of the affair is) we become highly and increasingly fixated on it. Areas of the brain light up when the reward is received and seek the reward when it’s not given. This wires pathways in the brain that are the hardest to extinguish, as strong as cocaine addiction. 2️⃣ Trauma Bonding: the Variable Reward’s impact on the brain creates a trauma bond. We understand trauma bonds to occur when there are “crumbs” in a relationship. It’s hot when it’s on, it’s cold when you can’t be in touch. It’s amazing when you’re together, it’s devastating when they’re on a trip with their family. It’s hope and possibility, then disappointment and limitations. You get the gist. Even though this not the intention of those in the affair (unless they are purposely abusive) a trauma bond is caused by the intermittent nature of the affair relationship itself. Variable interval reinforcement, and the Trauma bonds they create, leave us so uncertain and jonesing, so bonded to the person who is also the reason for our anguish and longing, that we can’t bear the thought of not having them. 🆘 Head to my profile for links to courses that are designed to support you through the life-gripping experience of an affair. Share this with someone who can benefit from this education! ❤️‍🔥 Follow so you don’t miss a post, like and save so IG knows this content is helpful to you 🫶🏼 #theaffairconsultant #affairhelp #affairs #trauma #bond #reward #reinforce #psychology #psych #brain #science #relationships #help #selfhealers #selfhelp #reasons #therapy #insight #learn #grow #heal #breakup #break #Love #heart #MentalHealth #mentalwellness #well #wellness #MentalHealthAwareness

LaurenLaRusso

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Thursday 13 June 2024 15:05:05 GMT