@spambiebambi: i REFUSE to let myself go back there. im up 20 pounds since last summer and im so so so proud of myself. its not always easy to look at myself in the mirror and be okay with my body but i KNOW that i look better now. sometimes its easy to fall back into bad habits in times when i feel bad about myself. but remembering im still beautiful & i look healthier is what keeps me going down this path. i hope that anyone who also struggles knows, you are not alone.