@goodmorgantherapy: Message SEEN if you want me free relationship masterclass! Or go to the link in bio! We do not resent people because of a build up of things they did to us. We resent people because of a build up of emotions we did not express. It’s the lack of validation baby! This was the biggest issue in our relationship. We still work on this to this day. We’re getting so much better though! Yay! But somebody can’t validate an emotion that you won’t admit that you have. That was huge! We weren’t at confronting our own emotions. We weren’t even good at knowing what they were. So when we first started expressing our emotions to each other more, it was jus anger and blame! It made it worse. It sounded like, “You hurt me. Here’s a list to prove I deserve to feel hurt. Now you fix it.” That doesn’t get me validation, because that’s not what I’m actually asking for. When I say that, I’m asking him to admit he’s the villain. How are we going to feeling like we are on the same team if I’m treating you like you’re my enemy? We’re not! So instead, we try to say what we’re feeling as often as we can and we try on feelings like outfits, and we figure it out together. I’m feeling angry, I’m feeling annoyed, I’m feeling scared, I’m feeling whatever. Will you be curious about it with me? That’s it! I’m feeling something, will you understand it with me?

goodmorgantherapy

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Tuesday 19 November 2024 19:41:29 GMT