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flightsoffantasypodcast
flightsoffantasypodcast
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Thursday 21 August 2025 19:04:11 GMT
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cheryl_edwards
cheryl_booktok :
It was soooo good
2025-08-22 11:09:41
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Our first instinct as parents is usually to explain. We want to help them understand. So we say things like, “Mommy doesn’t control the thunder. The clouds do.” It feels helpful. But that kind of logic doesn’t land with a 3-year-old's brain. They just aren’t developmentally ready for abstract reasoning yet. So instead of explaining, I showed him. I took his request seriously. We tried saying, “Please stop, thunder.” We tried clapping. We tried again. Then I asked, “What do YOU think we should do?” I gave him the chance to do his own problem solving. And when that still didn’t work, I modeled what it looks like to process failure and move on to a different kind of solution, a solution we are in control of, like covering our ears or booming back when the thunder booms at us. This approach takes his request seriously because it IS serious to him. It makes him feel heard and validated (which isn’t that what we all want?). This approach puts us on the same team. I want what he wants. I’m not holding him back or at fault here. This approach encourages him to find solutions to his own problems. I’m modeling creative problem solving, and also how to handle not getting what we want. And I'm using the opportunity to help build his ability to understand logic and reasoning. I’m helping him focus on what we can control. We can’t stop the thunder, but there’s more than one way to solve our problems. In just two minutes of conversation, the situation is diffused. We went from stressed to silly. We’re building the skills he’ll need to think creatively, take responsibility, and when things don’t go his way, stay focused on what he can control. .   . #kelsewhatelse #midwesternmom #howtotalktolittlekids #bodylanguagegame
Our first instinct as parents is usually to explain. We want to help them understand. So we say things like, “Mommy doesn’t control the thunder. The clouds do.” It feels helpful. But that kind of logic doesn’t land with a 3-year-old's brain. They just aren’t developmentally ready for abstract reasoning yet. So instead of explaining, I showed him. I took his request seriously. We tried saying, “Please stop, thunder.” We tried clapping. We tried again. Then I asked, “What do YOU think we should do?” I gave him the chance to do his own problem solving. And when that still didn’t work, I modeled what it looks like to process failure and move on to a different kind of solution, a solution we are in control of, like covering our ears or booming back when the thunder booms at us. This approach takes his request seriously because it IS serious to him. It makes him feel heard and validated (which isn’t that what we all want?). This approach puts us on the same team. I want what he wants. I’m not holding him back or at fault here. This approach encourages him to find solutions to his own problems. I’m modeling creative problem solving, and also how to handle not getting what we want. And I'm using the opportunity to help build his ability to understand logic and reasoning. I’m helping him focus on what we can control. We can’t stop the thunder, but there’s more than one way to solve our problems. In just two minutes of conversation, the situation is diffused. We went from stressed to silly. We’re building the skills he’ll need to think creatively, take responsibility, and when things don’t go his way, stay focused on what he can control. . . #kelsewhatelse #midwesternmom #howtotalktolittlekids #bodylanguagegame

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