WE'RE GOING 👏 TO THE BEST 👏 MEXICAN 👏 RESTAURANT 👏 IN 👏 TOWN AND WE'RE 👏 TIPPING 👏 THE 👏 BILL
2025-08-25 16:38:16
8282
sabrinatheadultagewitch :
Unfortunately my ER doctor husband tells me he has countless patients who live for YEARS in his current state. He made me mad when he told me this lol
2025-08-25 11:18:24
2783
Adrien David :
a national catastrophe happens every time my partner and I travel or make plans. we get married on Friday
2025-08-25 22:25:07
3603
BELLRRRR :
Old Soviet joke: old guy goes to the news stand every day, takes a look at front page of newspaper, leaves. One day, news stand owner asks “what are you looking for every day on the front page?” Old guy responds “an obituary.” News stand owner says “Comrade, the obituaries are in the back of the paper.” Old guy says “the one I’m looking for will be in the front page.”
2025-08-25 17:45:12
820
magnuscthulhu :
I've saved a day of PTO just in case.
2025-08-25 01:28:16
4995
Taylor 🧡 :
The big beautiful notification is coming 🇺🇸
2025-08-25 15:29:33
3649
jennasmash :
my baby is due 9/11 and I keep saying I'm praying for my own Trisha Paytas moment 😌
2025-08-25 14:43:38
1878
amativus :
Henry Kissinger died on my BIRTHDAY, do you know how many of my friends bought me drinks? Even long distance, I got Venmo alerts all night long. You’re right to prepare.
2025-08-25 06:10:04
8353
lordestan1014 :
I can’t drink but I will be buying the most extravagant cake I can find when it happens
2025-08-25 01:18:27
497
peach_mojito :
Party in the USA gonna shoot to #1 on Spotify
2025-08-25 16:08:21
1609
Bad biscuit :
You know that picture of Nicole Kidman when she divorced tom cruise and was celebrating in the street? Yea that’s gonna be me
2025-08-25 14:30:17
4175
Diana :
I keep thinking that it’s gonna happen on someone’s 21st bday and I love that for them
2025-08-25 23:11:50
660
Ranger Dan :
Except Vance is going to be even worse.
2025-08-25 22:22:29
1
Mrs Art Teacher Lady :
someone was shooting off fireworks at 5:30pm yesterday and I had to Google if it happened
2025-08-25 11:41:59
3460
Andre :
I know Vance is going to be worse but I'm still celebrating
2025-08-25 00:44:20
356
lolo :
i’m going abroad for 7 weeks on saturday and i am PRAYING it happens while i’m in europe. could you imagine? i would become the automatic guest of honor everywhere i go. man…
2025-08-25 03:57:51
612
justinmeeks :
You should live every day like it’s the last day of his.
2025-08-25 19:34:09
672
SUNY Minaj :
The thought of “President JD Vance” though …….
2025-08-25 22:40:06
4
RadioCody :
100% gonna be the greatest party day of all time
2025-08-25 00:04:46
1084
hrr_66 :
No you’re so right I should probably start hydrating now
2025-08-25 20:50:53
178
Johanna :
I’m keeping 2 PTO days locked and loaded for the day
2025-08-25 02:41:29
889
gigi :
imagine.. the leaves are changing.. pumpkin spice latte in hand… freedom 🇺🇸
2025-08-25 23:43:37
110
baciccol :
Huh. Finally a reason to keep going that isn’t “spite”.
2025-08-25 00:49:00
1044
Maddienow :
Roe v wade was overturned on my bday so this is the least the universe could do to make up for that 😂
2025-08-25 16:33:55
508
appalachianking3 :
Gonna be in the pubs like “_____ is in a box! _____ is in a box!”
2025-08-25 12:12:02
368
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