@ben_brainard: Floridians Fear Death Less a lot less... (Clip from my special: What a Mature Child) 9/21: Portland, OR 9/24: Spokane, WA 9/25-27: Tacoma, WA

Ben Brainard
Ben Brainard
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Region: US
Saturday 20 September 2025 01:01:45 GMT
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carnivalbearz
carnivalbearz :
in california we have earthquake drills, the midwest has tornado drills. in florida it’s alligator drills?
2025-09-20 02:36:33
552
aud_ro
aud_ro :
Snow is the only thing I’ve seen scare a Floridian. 😂 College roommate did not understand that we still had class after a blizzard.
2025-09-20 04:32:40
830
jessticulation
Jessticulation :
Native Floridian here. We got the alligator evasion lesson in 4th grade.
2025-09-20 01:30:17
2305
sewerkitten95
sewerkitten95 :
in wisconsin we're taught how not to drown in corn silos
2025-09-20 01:54:49
852
summertimespecter
。⋆ ✧ ˚。Summer⋆。˚☽ ・゚:* :
“We’ll teach you math if you make it to 12” is the most accurate way to explain Florida I’ve ever heard as someone from there
2025-09-20 01:18:50
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pinkiecrash57
kayla :
I forgot about the zigzag training in elementary school 😭 for non Floridians yes that was a REAL PART OF OUR CURRICULUM for elementary kids in the 2000's
2025-09-20 02:01:29
980
joytype1mom
JoY :
I learned zigzag sadly it has been disproven and alligators can climb fences.
2025-09-20 01:32:36
1451
renduh
Renae :
As someone who went to elementary school in Florida, can confirm they taught us how to avoid alligators. I don’t remember doing drills though 😂
2025-09-20 02:37:53
628
maddb13
maddbaughn :
Don’t forget learning the stingray shuffle! 😂
2025-09-20 11:00:16
800
jc_beck216_
JC_Beck :
Lived in Florida since the second grade (2003) I have yet to run into a gator. Bears yes, gators no
2025-09-20 01:42:34
81
justinmeeksesq
justinmeeks :
As an Arkansan, I was very confused then you said you were from Florida. I’m no longer confused.
2025-09-21 01:47:07
60
punkrockylives
Fox Among Wolves :
As a Floridian for 34 years, alligators are one of the most terrifying animals. They're fast on land, they're fast in the water, and they can climb fucking trees. I learned all of this at 9 and the fear those teachers put in me about alligators never left 😭😂
2025-09-20 23:02:56
190
greencat13
greencat13🇺🇲 :
I grew up in Miami and we had yearly trips to the Everglades starting in 1st grade to go we had to pass the drill
2025-09-20 01:47:08
305
aballofhappiness
HoneyBee95 :
Fight or Flight being broken is so real. I remember angrily walking to my car in a torrential downpour with lightning at 9pm and screamed at the sky, "If you hit me you better take me out the first time, because if I get up I'll kick your ass!" This was when I worked for the Mouse. I think I scared the college intern kids.
2025-09-22 12:35:59
64
steph.annie_crochets
🥀 Stephanie 🖤 :
My computer teacher in elementary school was from Florida and he taught us the zigzag run. We’re in western NC. Not a single alligator around here 😂
2025-09-20 02:57:58
60
scappye
ScappyE :
From Florida learn that information then like five years later, I learned that that’s horrible information because the alligator will keep running straight. You need to run in 90° turns and wait for it to turn before you start running again at a different 90°.
2025-09-20 01:36:51
92
_thatkat_
Katrina Skillman :
So my mom moved us from Massachusetts to Florida when I was about 8 yrs old and imagine my confusion when they started teaching me how to zig zag away from gators 😂 I went home and was like mom where did you move us 😂😂
2025-09-21 23:11:55
62
natandheropinions
Nat 🫶🌈 :
And then we rode in the backs of pick ups during hurricanes in middle and high school
2025-09-21 15:04:03
54
sunnydinosaured
Sunny Dinosaurs :
Elementary school seems a little late. Lots of 3 year olds know the zigzag trick
2025-09-20 01:28:52
95
lesbian_potato13
brokenw1ndow :
Not me as an Aussie genuinely thinking alligators were kinda pathetic, mostly harmless versions of crocs until today… you had drills??? We had fire drills and that was it😭
2025-09-20 13:55:48
78
jazzbuni
Jazzbuni :
I also remember learning to zigzag against gators 😂
2025-09-20 02:05:02
23
quinderella42
Casey Wylie582 :
Arkansan here 👋...you're not wrong
2025-09-20 01:35:08
79
_tiniest_panda_
TheTiniestPanda :
Zig zag drills were always followed up by “tornado” drills where we put textbooks over our head. 🤷🏼‍♀
2025-09-20 02:33:54
36
lordrahl3386
Robbie :
True story, it is a thing. 🤣
2025-10-17 17:16:07
6
gluteusmaximusthecat
Gluteus Maximus the cat :
We took field trips to go look at the gators. Not to the zoo. To the big lake that had a million gators just laying everywhere. We took small kids there and not a single person was like “a gator could potentially eat one of these small kids.” 🙃
2025-09-20 12:42:01
22
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