Codependency Kate
Region: US
Wednesday 24 September 2025 15:47:32 GMT
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Blue light special :
Delivery. It’s always my delivery that is the problem…
2025-09-25 17:54:37
335
dr. erb :
I was told that when I “complained” first thing in the morning, I’d ruin his day. But when I’d save conversations for the evening, I’d ruin the evening when he just wanted to relax 🙃🙄
2025-09-26 11:55:21
364
Julie :
Been saying “that’s not what i said, that’s what you heard” lately
2025-09-26 11:12:24
141
Bobbie :
As a wife who read Gottman's books trying to fix my marriage around year 2. I knew we weren't going to make it when he got defensive about listening to the book with me. Next month will be our 5th anniversary, but as of 2 weeks ago, I called time of death and we're completing our divorce paperwork this Saturday. Man that don't take accountability, that pretend to be awesome the way they are, yet know deep down that they are choosing complacency and nongrowth will no longer be a part of my story.
2025-09-25 04:09:12
83
Elle :
I feel like my complaints become criticism because he doesn’t responds or dismisses my complaint.
2025-09-24 19:55:18
117
Sara Jaffy :
I feel like my husband has trained me to not say anything, I’m scared to bring up anything, I also know it won’t be productive because he will be so defensive. It feels so hopeless.
2025-09-26 06:00:16
180
M 🦋 :
I’m stuck in a loop with this, mostly revolving around drastic differences in parenting.. and when even I try to talk about stuff or bring it up, I’m met with “I’m always made out to be the bad guy!!!” I’m so exhausted from this dynamic.
2025-09-24 16:30:52
95
The Annie House :
What if they are defensive just by having normal conversation or asking a question. I’m exhausted
2025-09-30 18:44:25
56
Denise :
Is them taking a complaint as if it were criticism projecting in a way? Like "I'm just a crappy dad/husband" when you bring something to their attention and nothing of the sort was even said
2025-09-26 05:15:42
21
Kate G :
FYI you’re reaching your target audience 🫠
2025-10-06 02:44:13
33
SareMo :
He's so defensive that when I approach kindly best tone.... he immediately is enraged
2025-10-16 20:38:37
7
canpakes :
If only this video were included in the basket of detergent samples the country gave me after we got our marriage certificate. Could’ve saved me from a long slow death of my soul.
2025-09-24 20:56:42
43
SassmouthPatty :
This is my husband. I am shattered. 6 years of this. I don’t want to loose my marriage but my husband has become toxic for me and I don’t know how to manage this
2025-09-27 15:02:04
21
forest witch :
what about different reactions to stress. I'm a pretty calm more stoic person and he's more passionate and reactionary. if I calmly state disappointment he takes it super personally but when he gets overwhelmed he gets dramatic body movements and emotions. we have been talking about this. but I'm curious about your take. I feel like there isn't room for my feelings. i think of it like how we sleep. he takes up three majority of the bed and I sleep close to the edge. i don't spread out you know? this is from childhood trauma btw.. I'm already working on it with my therapist. 👍
2025-09-24 23:34:52
7
Latcady :
“Behavior is always fair game.” 👌🏻👌🏻
2025-09-26 12:49:36
27
Alicioliofficial :
Can you talk about how a partner exposed to this lack accountability over time develops avoidance or defensiveness after the other partner consistently takes their willingness to hear them out and validate their experience as proof of their wrongdoing?
2025-09-25 17:06:28
11
…. :
You just taught me a lot. I am defensive and I didn't know how to identify it. I don't know how to show compassion or curiosity for my hubbys experience. I was never shown how and what it looks like. How do I work on this?
2025-10-18 04:56:22
8
Philly :
I can’t believe how validated I feel for “dying” within my marriage bc of you. Thank you for this series. As I’ve in the last year or two emotionally withdrawn he finally realized how checked out I was bc I wasn’t making the effort to placate him anymore. I’m so tuned out. Maybe it can be fixed.
2025-09-25 17:13:40
8
Rena Gade :
I think you kind of glossed over this, but people can respond defensively to both criticism and complaints.
2025-09-25 02:01:27
7
Taylor_Ashlynne :
How do you navigate when your partner only focuses on the delivery of your complaint? Example, they reacted said way (defensive) because your delivery wasn’t what they deem acceptable? Even though you think you came appropriately.
2025-11-16 11:49:32
4
*[Creations From Chaos]* :
what if I'm the defensive one 🥺
2025-10-17 18:33:04
0
🦝🦝🦝 :
My husband will say “✋🏻 I’ve had enough feedback, thanks” umm….
2025-11-16 21:50:13
1
Coolness :
Thank you for your expert advice I’m ending my 30 year marriage ASAP
2025-10-21 08:12:12
2
libbyloo :
Or you get NOTHING. No conversation, no change.
2025-11-15 10:46:17
1
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