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When someone asks me why I’m acting weird, I wish I had a simple answer. But the truth is, I don’t even know where to begin, because half the time I don’t even recognize myself anymore. It’s not just me being moody or quiet—it feels so much deeper than that. I don’t know who I am right now. I don’t know what I want, or what I’m supposed to feel. Everything inside me feels blurry, like I’m walking through a fog and every step forward makes me feel even more lost.
There are moments where I catch myself wondering if people notice the difference—how I’m not as present as I used to be, how my smile doesn’t reach my eyes anymore, how I hesitate before I answer even the simplest question because I’m constantly second-guessing everything I say. I laugh when I’m supposed to, I nod when people talk, I go through the motions of being “fine,” but inside it feels like I’m just pretending to be a version of myself that doesn’t exist anymore.
It’s exhausting, carrying this emptiness around and not being able to explain it. How do you tell someone that you feel like a stranger in your own body? How do you explain that you don’t know why you’ve changed, only that you have? I keep searching for the old me, the one who felt alive, the one who wasn’t constantly questioning their worth, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to find them again.
So when people ask why I’m acting strange, I stay quiet. Not because I don’t want to open up, but because I don’t have the answers myself. I don’t know what’s wrong, I don’t know why I feel like this, and I don’t know how to fix it. All I know is that I feel like I’m fading, like I’m becoming a shadow of the person I used to be. And maybe that’s why I seem weird—because I’m not even sure who I am anymore, and it scares me more than I can admit out loud.
2025-09-27 09:10:16