Codependency Kate
Region: US
Wednesday 05 November 2025 22:12:42 GMT
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Cassie :
I’m a Nanny, and the amount of times that I’ve had parents tell me that they have issues with their kids “stealing” food is absolutely asinine. Food in the home is food for your children. They can’t steal something that belongs to them.
2025-11-05 23:56:57
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valentine :
kids learn manipulative behaviors from adults around them or for survival
2025-11-06 00:48:00
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djoj :
Interesting perspective: if you teach your children to be people pleasers, then you're basically teaching them to manipulate you. You never notice, because they try to make you feel better so they can survive, but it's still manipulation
2025-11-06 09:19:40
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_7pal87 :
children cannot manipulate their parents because children have no power. they can try to influence their parents using all kinds of tactics to get their needs met, but that is being persuasive, not manipulative. (manipulative: characterized by unscrupulous control of a situation or person)
2025-11-06 04:40:02
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softpoachedegg :
My “mother” convinced herself that I, as a newborn baby, was manipulating her because I wouldn’t stop crying … as a newborn baby … that narrative continued since i lived with extremely emotionally neglectful parents and would have to almost demean myself just for crumbs of attention. Their fav phrase was “oh they’re just doing [insert whatever] for attention”. Yes, i wanted their attention lol, that was their entire job and they refused to do it.
2025-11-05 22:22:52
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Cassafrass47 :
knowing youre going to be ignored unless you do certain things... I honestly get irritated at coworkers and have to walk away when they talk about their "bitchy" teenage daughters... do you ask her what shes feeling instead of screaming at her?
2025-11-06 01:13:35
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tanet.c.t :
Any time I see a parent describe their child as a liar I just immediately think “oh so youre not a trustworthy parent”
2025-11-06 15:04:36
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Sarah🇨🇦 :
It is called safety seeking! They just do what they have to do to get their needs met. It's natural.
2025-11-06 02:17:00
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e :
Many of these comments are missing the fact that children don’t have fully developed frontal lobes- of course they’re going to go for the cookies etc if they don’t have impulse control wired in the brain yet
2025-11-06 02:36:01
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Shealyn :
my parents have thought I've been manipulating them about so much for so long that now I barely am able to even believe my own memories and reality
2025-11-06 01:57:23
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Sam :
one of my moms "manipulation" stories was just me trying to talk about my period with her. i mentioned a craving for chocolate and was basically working up to "is that normal, do you have this, mom im kind of fucking scared of my organs" and she cut me off accusing me of trying to ask for candy.
2025-11-06 19:02:50
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Bingo :
I find my parents and in-laws are both quite manipulative so if the kids are I am sure they learned it from the adults in the room. is that a projection when people say something like that?
2025-11-06 01:41:58
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itsjustlo7 :
Not only that, there are times when the kid isn’t being manipulative at all, that’s just an adult’s interpretation
2025-11-07 02:20:52
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Oh.No.Spaghetti.Oh :
They’re also not ‘spiteful’
2025-11-06 07:23:17
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uppabuttock :
A therapist told my mother I was manipulative because I got upset at night before school. Turns out I was just autistic and afraid of the school environment and bullying
2025-11-06 13:34:48
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Caitlin ♓🍉 :
I used to guilt myself for "manipulating" my abusive parents by sometimes just acting like I was having a panic attack from them screaming & berating me for hours... I just wanted them to stop... My therapist had to tell me I wasn't manipulative for that, I was just trying to survive....
2025-11-06 10:18:39
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Bec :
Words and their meaning vary between contexts. In this context I think the work that best discribes children’s behaviour is “egocentric” depending on the age, a child hasn’t developed the cognitive and emotional maturity required for complex decision making around other people’s feelings and desires.
2025-11-06 03:45:35
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Avery :
lot of bean soup sounding comments in here. she said kids are not -inherently- manipulative.
2025-11-06 15:34:18
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The Feral Ginger :
Is being manipulative and being “sneaky” the same thing? Like, if a child is not allowed to watch a certain show and they sneak at night after the parents go to sleep and watch it, is that the same as being manipulative? I guess I don’t understand what manipulation is lol.
2025-11-05 23:03:39
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stinebean04 :
I think this is oversimplifying. Sometimes kids want things or experiences that aren’t good for them and use manipulation to get it. I fully admit there were times I asked my dad for things I knew my mom would say no to with good reason. I would say I was being manipulative
2025-11-06 00:14:44
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idkman :
i believed that kids can't be manipulators untill i saw my younger sister. My parents were abusive and neglectful with me, then did a flip with her and she's extremely spoiled so no, she wasn't abused. I saw first-hand her flip into crying when she didn't get her way then immediately stop and smile as soon as she gets what she wanted. Same goes for magically being 'sick' as soon as she wanted something bc she knew that's extra brownie points. We're talking when she was like 4-6 yo. It only got worse as she grew up, she's the reason i believe some ppl are just horrible from the get go
2025-11-06 15:12:47
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•Nana• :
my child is using words or behavior to get me to do something for/connect with them so they feel safe? loved? No! it must horrendous, blasphemous MANIPULATION! they will not usurp my throne as PARENT!! *beats child*
2025-11-06 14:20:09
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Madmouse :
Same for lying, kids always learn that from their parents or because they don’t feel safe to tell the truth.
2025-12-02 17:59:46
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Miah :
‘The organism does what made the organism successful’ - we learn behaviours which help us to survive. It’s not a kid’s fault if those behaviours upset their parents.
2025-11-06 16:00:03
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