bigsis.grace
Region: US
Saturday 24 January 2026 18:00:14 GMT
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D H :
I am usually the smartest person in the room and it’s a problem. I hide it when I can because it interferes. It permits others to be dependent on me. They don’t get that there is a difference between intelligence and knowledge. Them being dependent on me takes away their autonomy and mine. Of course that can have weird side effects. I do sometimes have to intervene. I had a very junior colleague stop me and ask how I knew something. I pointed out that I am a doctor. They went “oh yeah, I forgot, I wondered how you knew all that stuff.” So I have colleagues that are thriving because they forget that I am smart, at the same time, I have strangers walk up to shake my hand because they’ve heard of the work that I do. I am quietly trying to change your world and passing mostly unnoticed. What do I do differently? I fail constantly. Indeed, I was having lunch with a colleague and she asked how it’s going, and I told her that I spent the last year failing at everything. She was quite glad for me. I’ve learned so much.
2026-01-26 18:37:02
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orionsdandelion :
I like this. I suffered the same thing. I am going to do this for 2026. Thank you.
2026-01-24 18:28:26
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lyndahcobb :
Bravo. ✨My kiddo is a genius…but my husband and I never complimented his intelligence. We complimented his hard work or initiative, and we had excited dinner talk about failure. I think it worked. He has always enjoyed the journey.
2026-01-24 20:36:49
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Quacktavius :
Rockstar advice. My best engineers are the question askers and not the answer givers. And it's not close. Be so excited to learn you just ask questions all day and grow. Even the basic ones. I'm a 20 year EE and just learned some year 1 pipe fitting knowledge last week. It was awesome (and yeah I looked dumb, but I learned!)
2026-01-28 01:57:20
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swan :
I relate to this a lot.
2026-01-24 20:29:41
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strictlyisland :
You are very sage, I’m impressed
2026-01-25 08:07:21
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boyle.oil :
I’m also from a Korean American family and can relate 🥲
2026-01-24 22:06:43
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Birdie Belle :
So interesting! Great take
2026-01-24 20:54:05
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thejoyofbrooke :
Love this honest take. The shift from proving you’re smart to pursuing learning is radically freeing. Something I’m trying to do as well. 🫶🏼
2026-01-24 20:37:10
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Bibliophibian :
I am with you! I started doing this a few years ago, and it’s been life changing - no joke
2026-01-28 17:27:46
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🐫 :
this is soo true!! can I dm you to ask about your experience at hbs?
2026-01-27 22:09:03
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Kat Moon :
Love this!
2026-01-30 05:21:23
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peterkoo4 :
I try to pretend dumb as much as I can 😅
2026-01-24 19:13:03
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K C :
LOVE THIS.
2026-01-24 18:53:20
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Prizmatic :
Thank you for the perspective 💖
2026-01-24 20:25:16
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useralooa5ygg9 :
Agree! My father taught us to be “teachable”. He would always ask us, “are you teachable”? I ask questions…don’t think I’m smart, but I know, I know there’s stuff to learn. That I do know.
2026-01-28 02:18:52
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DecodeHanzi :
This is a very SMART decision! 😁
2026-01-27 00:44:03
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VonNarwhal :
Jesus. You’re right.
2026-01-25 18:36:05
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HeyProfBow :
Read Mindset by Carol Dweck (Stanford psych Prof). It’s basically what you are talking about. You’ll appreciate it
2026-02-12 01:58:06
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Farrah Dyer • Hypnotherapy :
This is so incredibly powerful!! Thank you for sharing! I’m going to make 2026 my dumbest year yet 🙌
2026-01-25 23:21:13
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kat :
This is so true! I grew up being called smart to the point where I became valedictorian. And guess what--no one in the real world fucking cares. Even my Asian parents don't care anymore. Let's normalize complimenting kids on things they can control like their work ethic and their perseverance rather than things they can't like their intelligence or appearance
2026-01-25 17:20:51
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