kissy🎧 :
“a drag path” but it’s me having to live with constant fascination and constant hesitation at the same time. i find myself drawn to so many things, pulled in by curiosity, by the idea of what i could become if i just let myself try. it’s not a lack of interest that holds me back, it’s the opposite. i care too much, think too much, imagine too much. every possibility feels so vivid in my head, but instead of pushing me forward, it weighs on me until i stay exactly where i am.
i spend more time observing than participating. i watch people do the things i secretly wish i had the courage to pursue, and i feel both inspired and distant from it all. it’s like standing at the edge of something beautiful and convincing myself i don’t belong there. i tell myself i’ll start later, when i’m more ready, more confident, more certain, but that version of me never seems to arrive. so everything i’m fascinated by becomes something i only ever orbit, never fully step into.
and the worst part is knowing that nothing is really stopping me except myself. that i could take a step forward, even a small one, but i don’t. so the path stretches out in front of me, not blocked, not broken, just untouched. and i stay here, caught between wanting and fearing, watching my own life from the side, letting it drag on without me ever truly moving.
2026-04-07 06:59:52