Kindahuman :
hey if anyone sees this and you want to help a brother out with some spiritual guidance and navigating a very niche situation, I would love some advice. the short version of it is I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, the rock is if someone would ask you to go one mile with them go two, and the hard place is love, because there's nothing loving about enabling the slothful manipulative negligent behavior of my in-laws. basically as people they're extraordinarily negligent slothful and I don't mean this is an insult but incompetent, and so because they won't be functioning adults and handle their problems they pile everything onto my wife (who is already limited because of her disability, severe classical ehlers-danlos syndrome) and they manipulate and manipulate to bring her into a sort of bondage where she feels that she has to carry all of this weight for them (she was quite literally Cinderella in the first half of the story before I "stole" her from them, in that she handled all of their cooking and cleaning and laundry and everything else) and it leaves our household much much poorer for it because my wife then has no time or energy to take care of our household. not to mention the severe emotional distress inflicted on her and by extension myself because of their self-centered narcissistic nonsense. and I'll be honest, they are one of the hardest part for me being a Christian for me, by which I mean navigating the situation improper alignment with Christ has been extraordinarily difficult for me, I don't hate them, but I hate how they are, and I hate how their behavior affects my wife, and how in turn it affects our marriage, I try really hard not to hate them. As Christians we are a generous helpful kind compassionate people by the grace of God in the gift of His Holy Spirit, but on that same coin is there anything kind about allowing them to stay as they are, by enabling their behavior? it's a real headache, and I go back and forth on this all the time it is one of the greatest single points of contention of my entire life is my freaking in-laws.
2026-03-04 18:27:15