Mutton dressed as lamb /mʌt.ən drɛst æz læm/ idiom A derogatory term used to describe an older woman who dresses or behaves in a way considered “too young” for her age. One of my favourite things to do is unpick language and how it’s used to control and police women (and men too if they don’t fit in the rigid rules of masculinity). This weekend I was called mutton dressed as lamb for the first time. Jesus, I thought, I’m only 38. But then I caught myself, because I remember how OLD 38 felt when I was younger, so part of me thought… fair. But when you actually break it down, it’s really quite grim. In my book, I explore how language and phrases are used to control and police us, and what strikes me is that even though we’re in 2026, our expectations and language still keep us rooted in the 1950s. It’s why we still ask if a dad is “hands-on” and tell women how “lucky” they are if their partner “helps”. It’s why we still question if we’re “too picky” or should “settle”, and why there’s this fear of being “left behind” if we haven’t met someone by 30. It’s why we’re warned not to be “left on the shelf”, as if being single is a failure. It’s why marriage is sold as the ultimate reward for women who act like “marriage material”, while men frame it as losing freedom, even though we know it benefits them more. It’s why men are “silver foxes” and “bachelors”, while women are pitied, either having “let themselves go” or “tried too hard”. And the worst thing is, whilst this comment came from an audacious man, it so often comes from women too. Internalised misogyny is real, and it’s something we’re all unpicking. It’s why Heidi Klum was described as “matronly” at the Oscars. The patriarchy is terrified of older women, because we know our worth and we see through the BS. Imagine if we were actually revered. If our wisdom was respected. We could warn younger women, we could help them rise. Honestly, I was living my best mermaid life on Friday night, and this mutton is going to keep ageing like a fine wine, wearing corsets and living my best life. And I will never look 18, because I’m not a child. And that is ok. #fyp - @ashleyjames