You’re gonna wanna save this one 🔥 One of the sneakiest forms of projection is assuming other people share your values. Recovering people-pleasers, fawns, and over-functioners often project their own good intentions onto other people, and that’s exactly how we get hooked! 😳 Instead of reading and honoring the pattern, we start trying to fix it 😬 We think: ✨Maybe I can explain it better. ✨Maybe if I stay calm enough, loving enough, clear enough, they’ll meet me here. ✨Maybe if I help them understand, we can finally get somewhere. But if someone has a different agenda, or benefits from vagueness, or avoids accountability, or simply doesn’t value clarity, repair, and reciprocity the way you do... that is NOT your project to solve 🔥 As you heal from people-pleasing, fawning, and co-dependent tendencies, you are NO LONGER RESPONSIBLE FOR: 🔥 anticipating other people’s needs 🔥 Other people’s comprehension of what you’re trying to communicate (if they don’t understand, THEY are responsible for asking clarifying questions) 🔥 proving yourself 🔥 other people’s behavior 🔥 being blamed for someone else’s triggers or dysregulation 🔥 whether or not someone chooses to grow 🔥 managing other people’s perceptions of you 🔥 other people’s boundaries 🔥 their reaction to your boundaries You are responsible for how YOU show up. What YOU communicate. The boundaries YOU express. And whether you stay connected to yourself while doing it (this all takes practice)❤️ Some of us stayed too long because we assumed the other person wanted the same things we did when, looking back, we can see that they clearly didn’t 😭 Healing sometimes looks like realizing that without making it your next emotional side hustle. Save this for the next time confusion tries to recruit your people pleasing habits 🔥 And tell me below - which “I’m no longer responsible for….” Is the one you’re working on the most right now? Celebrating you and your growth - every baby step counts 🎉 - @abby_vernon_