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Thursday 23 April 2026 22:24:24 GMT
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Lily Vibes :
Can I ask: how come you’re using Rula? Sorry, just curious cuz I hear some odd experiences when using those platforms. Not always ofc
2026-04-24 20:15:09
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olivia :
I totally see what you mean. As a therapist and someone w/ adhd, it can be hard to hear “just push through” when you don’t have the rapport established with this person and when you’re already being really hard on yourself. Usually when you have a strong negative reaction to something a therapist does or says, it’s because you don’t feel heard or understood. I think therapists jump to solutions too quickly before having a really good idea of the big picture of what is going on. Imo, coping skills aren’t crucial right away unless you’re in an active crisis and cannot regulate or function.
2026-04-23 22:51:50
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beginner.homemaking :
as a therapist i would find it very valuable to get this feedback from a client. let her know.
2026-04-25 03:24:01
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Cobiashi :
I want to offer this thought; I fully understand your desire to ask "why am I like this?". I will ask you though; does why matter? at the end of the day, what does "why" do for you? Often therapists are trained to not focus on the why because even if you can determine why you are depressed,... you're still depressed. I sympathize with you and your not feeling heard, and I encourage you to keep your mind open to other avenues of healing. As mentioned, it is early on, but therapy is collaborative. Vocalize your concerns but also be open to what the therapist has to say. The greatest determinant for success in therapy is the hope you both can hold for you! (respectfully, an LCMFT who doesn't know you)
2026-04-24 04:46:47
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Heather K. PsyD :
CBT doesn’t work for everyone. If it work for you, great. But there are clients for whom CBT is just not going to do what you need and for some it’s very specifically harmful. I would suggest being honest with her. Develop a set of questions about what therapy looks like with her and what are her approaches. What does that look like? Have a conversation about what you want to achieve and see if she is responsive to that. She has certain skills, knowledge, and training and that may not mesh with your current needs. That doesn’t mean either of you is wrong. You may very well not be a fit for CBT derived therapies. That’s ok. You just then need to try something else. But it’s your therapy and you have the right to find what benefits you.
2026-04-24 13:42:31
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Sweet Goodness :
Ok so the breathing & container exercises tell me she’s setting things up to go deeper by making sure she can ground you and help you feel safe if you get dysregulated in session. So maybe give it a few more sessions before you decide. But yeah, if she’s CBT you might try IFS or depth work or ACT. I’m an emotional girlie and I haaaate CBT bc the premise is that thoughts are in control of emotions and for me, it’s like the opposite.
2026-04-24 20:39:43
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KJC :
those comments enraged me for you! I totally understood what you were saying. I have found somatic nervous system work to be the only thing that works for me and that could be a therapist or coach. sounds like you are trying to think your way out of this and we have to get out of our heads and into our bodies so "the work" is learning how to do that so we can respond with safety. its a nervous system issue, it's not you or unrealistic expectations!
2026-04-24 10:31:37
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ciciq70 :
You should look into getting a therapist that specializes in trauma focused therapy. Even if you think you don’t have trauma, still do it because they will spot your patterns and dig for the root of it
2026-05-16 21:17:26
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Richard Clark :
You're right, It's your therapist's job to attune to you. If you continue to feel unseen and are still in California, you can search for me through Rula.
2026-04-24 17:34:12
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Shmensss :
Maybe if you see that therapist again you can talk about how you felt after that session! I think it could be important for you to let her know those feelings. There is defo a case of where maybe her expectations and yours were different an getting on the same page could be helpful! Sorry that it wasn’t a good session for you! Therapy is work on your part and on theirs and should be a symbiotic relationship.
2026-04-24 00:00:53
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robyn mercy :
As a therapist, I get it. Therapy is hard and it can look different for everyone. I want my clients to be honest about their expectations and also what is working and what isn’t. Therapy is your time. We make adjustments based on where you are and what you’re ready for. My advice? Be honest about all of these feelings with her.
2026-04-24 16:09:47
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Ustrina (Kev) :
Girl, the comments in your last video were not it 😭 I usually tell folks to give a therapist four sessions and to not hesitate with giving them feedback. Tell her you what you want and what has or hasn’t worked for you in the past. If she can’t adjust for you, break up with her. TBH the hardest part of therapy is finding the right human to do it with 😭
2026-04-24 13:39:52
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aaalyssanu :
Narrative Therapy or IFS might be beneficial!
2026-04-24 23:30:24
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valmeowerie :
What did you like about the therapist you enjoyed? I would look closely at the bios for the therapists available on the platform you’re using. Look that they use many different modalities and say that you want to process the root, not just make an action plan. As a therapist, I use parts of many modalities to tailor therapy to each client - not every therapist is great with this. Don’t be discouraged, it can take time to find someone that you click with and that gets what you want. But you can say what you want! It’s our job to help you, you’re in charge. 😊
2026-04-25 00:10:16
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Sal :
Hi look into attachment-focused EMDR. Help you get to the root of the presenting symptoms/problems
2026-05-30 06:02:52
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carson :
My advice would be to be honest about this with your therapist in the next session. Tell them how you felt about the second session and what frustrated you. It might be uncomfortable to tell them, but therapy honestly is often uncomfortable. Also have you looked into the different modalities?
2026-04-24 02:37:55
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Elaina B :
i’m gonna second a lot of ppl here but defff feel free to say no to things! you have autonomy in sessions and if you don’t like the approach your therapist is using or if you’d rather talk abt something g else pls feel free to say that, the goal is to make the space be suitable for you and your needs ofc the therapist will have things prepared but you can def bring up exactly what you want to talk abt any time good luck!! ❤️
2026-04-24 04:34:06
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Mental Health Tok :
In the first couple of sessions, therapists often focus on stabilization rather than going deep into past experiences. This can include teaching breathing techniques and providing education about depression or anxiety. The goal is to help manage symptoms in the moment so it becomes easier to engage in more meaningful therapeutic work later. If therapy has not felt helpful in the past, it is often related to inconsistency or lack of a stable therapeutic relationship. Therapy tends to build over time, and frequent changes in providers or short episodes of care can limit progress. Medication is sometimes added when symptoms are more moderate to severe, persistent, or significantly affecting daily functioning. In those situations, it can reduce symptom intensity, improve sleep, energy, and concentration, and make it easier to participate in therapy and benefit from it. For many people, the combination of therapy and medication is more effective than either alone, depending on symptom severity and history.
2026-04-23 23:24:58
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user457362086193 :
I’m not a therapist yet but I do practice as a QMHP-CS in mh. An experience I’ve had with new clients who have been in therapy before is that they are knowledgeable on many of the interventions, coping skills, and grounding skills. So I can see where the frustration comes when therapist are spending time telling you something you already know. Just remember this is her first time w/you, she was not present in your other sessions. The best way is to communicate with her what you already know, what has worked, and what hasn’t worked. Also, get information on medication because it can help with the biological factors.
2026-05-25 16:30:41
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Charlie :
Try someone who does ACT, SFBT or MI
2026-04-24 14:22:44
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The Feral Therapist :
I am going to revisit this... "So many different therapist"... It's like dating. You may need to try different ones until you find the right one. Not all of us are the same.
2026-04-25 11:19:38
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OL Livy Lynn :
Total respect to all modalities, and the fact that therapy is quite subjective. That being said as a therapist that is trained in more relational work and deep insight the metaphor I use is there are some versions of therapy that give you skills that relate to Band-Aids, which can be very helpful when you have small nicks and cuts. Other therapies are more metaphorically surgical and get deeper to cause, patterns and history. Often times people want to put these into binary categories which can be hard. That being said there are people who are high intellectualizers aka you’re often in your head, trying to make sense of something which can include the “why” and for those people sometimes you can get kind of stuck in your head and almost guillotine yourself from your body. So there are some people that just get really in the story of how did this come to be and they’re not really feeling it inside. Not sure if that resonates but it’s where a lot of somatic therapies come in handy because those exist not to necessarily change a way you’re thinking, but to actually allow you to witness and feel what’s going through your body. For people who intellectually understand what they need to be doing, but they just can’t seem to do it That often is the gap.
2026-04-25 18:17:10
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sg.brooklyn :
yeah it’s weird as fuck that people were jus commenting , “it’s probably you”. lots of therapists nowadays are burnt out and sometimes it can take a LONG time to find one you actually mess with it. it’s not your fault
2026-04-23 23:45:06
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