⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀᠌ ︎ ︎⠀ ⠀ :
I think I'm done chasing her, and that's something I never thought , i would actually say, because for the longest time, I kept convincing myself that if I just try a little harder, if I stayed a little longer and, if I just love you a better, then maybe one day, she would look at me the way I looked at her, but somewhere along the way I realized that I was the only one running after something that was never really running back to me, and I don't even know why it took me this long to see it, maybe because loving her made me blind? or maybe because I didn't accept that someone I cared about that deeply could let me feel this alone? and it's not like I suddenly stopped loving her, because I didn't, I still care about her in ways I probably shouldn't, but I'm just so tired of feeling like I have to chase someone just to be noticed, and I hate admitting that I stayed this long, hoping that she would eventually turn around and say "wait don't go, I want you too", but she never did, and maybe that silence was the answer I kept refusing to hear, and now I'm finally starting to understand something that hurts more than anything else, she were never mine, I just love her like she were, and that's why letting go feels so heavy, because I'm not just leaving her, I'm leaving the version of us that only existed in my head, the one where she actually chose me the way I choose her, and maybe weren't meant for each other, maybe thats truth I kept fighting for so long, and if that's the case, then fine I won't chase her anymore, I won't keep trying to prove that I'm worth loving, because love never supposed to feel like this, and i truly hope she's happy with whoever she choose, because even after everything, a part of me still wants good things for her, I just finally realized that I can't keep destroying myself trying to be one of them,
2026-05-07 17:27:32