The Pottymouth Guru
Region: CA
Saturday 02 May 2026 16:49:00 GMT
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MedicusUrsa :
And what if even the pattern is changing, but the other person refuses to see it, runs the whole narrative so that it fits the pattern, is trapped in only seeing the pattern? Even when it has gone.
2026-05-02 19:09:27
24
anthony forster :
I keep running the hamster wheel. I react instantly to my beautiful wife who has put up with a lot from me over our 40 year's and then I try to repair what I've said or done I am trying to change the way I react. Any help you can offer would be appreciated as I don't want to lose her. Thank you from the UK
2026-05-03 14:32:54
8
The Pottymouth Guru :
Do you feel like you’re fixing the moment… or actually changing the pattern?
2026-05-02 16:50:38
10
weirdwitchywonderful :
yes it's hard because he only notices and attempts to repair the big hurtful things but when I get upset about the little things that signal the same disregard for me I'm dramatic but it's he general pattern of not considering me that makes me feel unloved
2026-05-04 23:13:42
15
Christa :
Oh this landed. He wants to check the box, complete the task, and move on. Then accuses me of moving the goalposts. I find myself constantly frustrated, saying “It’s not about the [insert whatever current issue we’re talking about]!”
2026-05-23 04:12:22
3
McDoodle :
We worked with a marriage councillor trained in Gottman and this was my exact issue. Don’t “kitchen sink” and patterns never got addressed.
2026-05-03 19:00:18
5
Dana 🩵🪩🌺 :
This is exactly where I am and not does my boyfriend not get it he chalks most things up to that I'm too hard on him, that I have the same issues as him and that I only focus on the negative meanwhile we get in a cyclical fights weekly. I'm exhausted
2026-05-10 23:41:36
3
Maureen :
This is awesome as are all of your messages! Thanks 😊
2026-05-02 18:38:26
3
An Avid Reader :
It felt like a performance. Especially in front of the couples therapist. He’d perform the apology and I’d have to perform the acceptance. But the issue (that whole shame management thing) was never really addressed.
2026-05-24 15:51:20
2
Nikki 🇨🇦 :
going through this exactly to the T right now!!
2026-06-22 12:39:11
1
… :
Girl. Ma’am . Madam. Why do you keep doing this to me😭
2026-05-02 18:02:40
5
jessjrod :
Repair
2026-06-04 12:19:25
0
Mrs. Bloom 🌸 :
You are spot on on all your videos about the DA. This is my husband. I’m exhausted.
2026-05-05 19:53:07
3
manicmeatballs :
I can’t with your hair. It’s tooooo good. I love it! And your info 🥰
2026-05-06 04:02:31
2
AliciaFrancis :
your language is so incredibly helpful. i have been trying to explain this pain to my partner for a YEAR. this was so incredibly helpful.
2026-05-26 03:40:53
1
karijo2035 :
I would like to hire you
2026-05-05 18:07:50
0
Sana :
Well said
2026-05-06 06:03:12
1
Gumoza :
Repair
2026-06-12 18:06:26
0
Kel Smith :
At some point, security must come from within.
2026-05-13 12:12:54
0
Melissa Nix Spence :
Repair 🙏🏼
2026-05-06 06:05:18
0
Andrew John Kitchen🇨🇦 :
so what im seeing in this situation the person repairing thinks they are doing ot. the person who was hurt sees nothing changed. so should the person repairing check in with the person hurt so they know if the repair is working for the person that is hurt. example person repairing think they are succeeding on structure level but unknowingly failing. would it be a good idea to check in every couple of weeks with partner that you are on the right track? or does that come off as change for validation vs genuine change?
2026-05-17 14:00:40
0
Jwenz :
Repair
2026-05-15 18:42:01
0
RcknPP7 :
I see a lot of videos on how to repair and communicate, but how do we decide when a dynamic is not going to change, and how do you take the next steps in a relationship like this?
2026-06-27 22:01:48
0
l :
I wish more people left instead of trying to repair something with a person who hurt them deeply like this. Someone getting the chance to play in your face twice is horrifying.
2026-06-21 06:47:51
0
no_longer_totally_chill_ :
For different reasons, the two have the same behaviors and issues. The dynamic is doubled and compounds the struggles. htms
2026-05-05 20:50:58
0
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