Johnny Cade :
I remember on New Years last year, I was told “go away, why are you even here?” by one of my brothers, so I just ran up to my bedroom and laid there for two hours, scrolling, completely alone, on the verge of tears, listening to people have fun downstairs. I came back downstairs, since it was almost midnight, and only 2 people asked where I was. There were about 50 people in my house. Only two cared. There was about half an hour left until midnight, so I tried to talk to people, but everyone dismissed me and talked to someone else, so I just stood in the middle of the room next to someone who was talking to their friend, trying not to cry. When it came to midnight, only my parents and three others said happy new years to me. Out of 50. I just sat and ate food sadly, feeling numb as I listened to peoples conversations, feeling like the biggest outsider in my own home. I felt so alone, even in a room full of people. That pretty much sums up every family event.
2026-06-01 21:49:35