Laura Clery
Region: US
Thursday 21 May 2026 21:20:26 GMT
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Sky 🏳️⚧️ :
It sounds like they were using old-school APA therapy rather than trauma informed ABA therapy
2026-05-21 21:27:51
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Laura Clery :
Also, this was when he was 2years old. I started it up again recently for eloping only for safety so a few hours a week. The experience is so different .. the Therapist is so kind and just really cheers them on when he acts safely.
2026-05-21 23:45:13
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Sadie Miller :
ABA has been magical for my son. They got him potty trained, taught him instead of throwing markers he makes art, helped him manage his emotions when in a meltdown… gosh I could write a book. ABA has been the biggest blessing for our son.
2026-05-21 21:32:07
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Kay :
I think not all aba is created equal.
2026-05-21 21:44:01
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trishaninja :
As an RBT - Ignoring bad behavior is imminent. However, a child being in utter distress calls for acknowledgement and redirection. When a child is clearly in distress, I acknowledge how they feel first and offer them options to self regulate. Would they like a break? Some water? A hug? Functional communication ALL DAY EVERY DAY. NEVER EVER make a child feel that their emotions are ignored. Options, options, options!! Life is about options!
2026-05-21 22:07:08
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Sasha Diaz :
This is not ABA. Whatever occurred there was unethical. I’m so sorry you experienced that. Sincerely a case manager
2026-05-22 06:13:15
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Kristen Martinez :
OT here… he was likely dysregulated and his sensory system was in overload. All the little sensory inputs and exposures that knock him off his balance beam of support added up and sent him into this state. Your instinct to scoop him and help him regulate was the correct one. 👏👏👏 ABA is not always the answer.
2026-05-22 04:14:58
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octavia 🦀 :
As an autistic adult, I would love to see more conversations with autistic adults on your podcast. I’m glad you stopped ABA.
2026-05-21 21:53:11
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Rylie :
Parents and grandparents have an extremely difficult time sitting through extinction bursts. That’s why it’s important for the parents and grandparents to implement planned ignoring, and stick to the plan. The BA and techs are hawk eye observing the behaviors and will intervene if necessary. That’s the idea anyway. They are meltdowns for a reason. Depending on the bx of concern and function of the behavior (functional behavior assessment)…determines how to address said bx of concern.
2026-07-13 22:50:01
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Snow Ryn. :
I am autistic and meltdowns are not attention seeking!! They are caused by extreme overwhelm and the feeling happening in our bodies is so intense we would do anything to make it stop.
2026-05-22 01:38:44
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LakeChef :
ABA isn’t meant for every child. Don’t let people make you question yourself.
2026-05-21 22:22:50
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Tracy :
This is not all ABA. I’m so sorry you experienced this but you have a big platform please do not discourage people from ABA as if you find the right place/people it is miraculous. There is a big stigma around ABA so I stress seeing negative posts like this as I hope it doesn’t push people away from getting their child help. Wishing you guys more positive experiences in the future. The way the RBT/BCBA handled it was not ok at all. I’m glad you guys were there for him in that moment
2026-05-22 02:01:42
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M :
Oh no, we don’t ignore, we redirect 🥺
2026-05-21 22:15:07
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sarbear :
i wish aba wasn’t so chance-based. it is completely dependent on your company/clinic/therapist/bcba. at my job, we ignore the behavior but not the child. we still console, physically or verbally depending on the child’s preference, but we don’t say things like “stop crying”, “why are you crying?”, “don’t scream”, etc
2026-06-29 05:42:05
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Kourtney:)) :
As an RBT, it sounds like they were escalating him rather than helping. I’m sorry that was your experience
2026-05-22 11:58:25
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Yessy🍒 :
Yup. For 9 years I had the worst experience with 3 different ABA companies. My son started thriving and showed more improvement once I removed ABA and only kept speech and OT.
2026-05-24 19:33:33
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Sara🫶🏻 :
That was bad ABA implementation. A good clinician understands a child’s window of tolerance and knows when it shifts into needing to help them regulate their emotions. I’m so sorry. 😞
2026-05-22 08:44:14
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Laura Clery :
No, this was also when my son was too, and I am totally aware that this could have been a bad technician or a bad Agency lots of factors here.
2026-05-21 21:58:59
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Mi creative chaos :
Yeah that bcba didn't do protocol correctly. Once you find the function of the behavior then you have a plan. That's sounds like it was not attention seeking and he was upset about something. There were many other aba ways to go about that. Look into compassionate aba it's different
2026-05-21 21:38:04
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Gabrielle❤️ :
ABA saved my kids life. He learned more then I could ever have taught him because of those angels
2026-05-23 21:31:16
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user6914799280882 :
As a BCBA, this makes me sad to hear. We are not all like this. Promise. ❤️
2026-05-22 21:09:06
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Breezy :
As a BCBA, I'm so sorry this was your experience with ABA. No child deserves to be totally ignored during a meltdown. The only time "the bad stuff" should be ignored is when the function of a behavior is connection-seeking, like the candy situation you described, & there should always be a replacement behavior being taught in those moments. Also, even if there is a legitimate reason to ignore a behavior, it's never okay for a staff member to continuously pressure or prevent a parent from attending to or comforting their child when they feel their child is needing support. The parent is the only person in the room that truly knows their child, & their thoughts & opinions should be top priority at all times. Rest assured that some of us care deeply about supporting autistic children's mental health & well-being when providing ABA services, & prioritize this above all else. Sending love 🫶🏽
2026-05-21 22:51:41
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HtotheT🇨🇦 :
Yep, that’s old ABA - there is a gentler and trauma assumed approach now
2026-05-23 23:39:56
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Karen Lucia :
I had a similar situation. I was told to extend my arm out to not allow my crying child to come up to me and fully ignore them. Never again. My kid was 2 btw
2026-05-27 20:54:48
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I’m actually called Mildred :
Ignoring communication does not help to teach other ways to communicate
2026-05-22 09:36:51
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