@lostsoulnlife: Do you even realize how much you traumatized me? Back then, I constantly questioned myself, wondering what kind of person I was actually with. Some days you were affectionate, loving, and took care of me so well. But other days , especially after drinking , you became someone I couldn’t recognize. You became aggressive, verbally hurtful, and used words that slowly broke me down. I was raised in a family where people spoke with respect, even during anger. So every time it happened, it shocked me. But whenever I tried expressing how hurt I was, my feelings were dismissed and I was made to feel like I was overreacting. And because I loved you so deeply, I started questioning myself instead. Over time, I became confused. Because when you were sober, you could be kind and caring. But when you drank, you hurt me emotionally, then expected everything to disappear the next day with a simple apology. Do you know what that does to a person? Eventually, my body started remembering the pain before my mind even could. Every time you drank, I became anxious. I started trembling. I lived in fear of which version of you I was going to get. And every time I wanted to leave, you cried, begged, promised to change, and I foolishly held onto hope that things would finally be different. But the cycle kept repeating. I kept getting hurt. And I kept forgiving until one day, I emotionally broke. Do you know how much pain someone must go through before they walk away from a stable life, relocate completely, and rebuild themselves from scratch? And after everything, what hurts the most is seeing how easily I became the villain in your story. But I no longer feel the need to defend myself. The people who truly know me will understand my silence. Because I didn’t leave for someone else. I left for myself. I left because I was slowly losing my peace, my happiness, and the person I used to be trying to survive a love that kept hurting me. And despite everything, I still choose healing. Because I finally understand that saving myself was never selfish but it was necessary.

lostsoulnlife

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Sunday 24 May 2026 13:49:52 GMT