Codependency Kate
Region: US
Friday 29 May 2026 19:31:10 GMT
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Steven Ing, MFT :
Kate, I am so touched to see you helping us all in this way. Please think of me as a partner with you in this.
2026-05-29 19:39:49
119
erlg2525 :
Except when you have children this isn’t possible. We have to continue to engage as normal so the children’s lives aren’t disrupted in any way and so they don’t feel the tension. We still make the dinners cause if dad is the only one not eating the meal they will notice and children will internalize that.
2026-05-29 20:42:28
25
tammylentine :
I did all those things. It doesn’t work for us. he won’t even give me 15 minutes to watch our daughter 3 for 25 minutes so I can take a shower.
2026-06-01 02:04:40
6
allthefallenfigs :
What if they start blaming your (response) detachment for why things are bad? “I’m lonely and I’m mourning our marriage.”
2026-07-22 21:33:47
0
Anja Theunissen :
I detached and I became the problem instead of him.
2026-05-30 09:23:21
11
Daisy's daughter :
My husband and I have been in therapy together and separately for 10 years. I did do this and it did work. we're doing amazing
2026-05-31 15:36:59
11
Oish🇨🇦 :
I wish I had a nickel for the amount of times I have had to tell adults that they are the adults
2026-05-29 20:04:02
49
Miss Cartographer :
I don’t think rock bottom is possible within marriage. I think it requires divorce.
2026-05-30 13:06:28
15
Ceiba tree consulting :
Means filing for divorce. That’s what rock bottom is. Cause I did all the other stuff. At this point I don’t give a hoot and holler.
2026-05-30 01:44:54
24
Mrs Cookie Monster :
I don’t think this will work for everyone.
2026-05-30 16:18:28
0
Cate :
Did this to my boyfriend before he became my husband. Married 6 years. Very happy. This works.
2026-06-04 19:51:06
1
Descarti :
weird question, but it is the opposite situation for my husband and me where I am the one who doesn't help out with planning, chores, etc. how do I make myself want to help out around the house when he does everything? I will stay on a chore for a few weeks, then I stop, nothing happens, so I continue not to help out. I know this is on me. it is hard to start helping out when it all just "happens". I am so wrapped up with my work that I am just used to this life, but I feel terrible about how much my husband does.
2026-06-26 15:07:46
0
Bethany 🤍 :
Yup. All of this! Divorce was the solution for me. Wish I would have known to stand up long before I actually did.
2026-05-30 04:22:28
14
Luna & Cactus : Travel + 40 :
Not my mom, she thinks my brothers are her husbands 😳
2026-06-03 06:05:25
2
🍉 🌻 🌱 :
This feels like the silent treatment/stonewalling/acting out?
2026-06-03 05:49:35
1
A.A.N :
I’d like the original video you posted I need to revise it
2026-05-29 21:16:33
3
jo :
one time when I was holding a boundary my husband was like "why do you treat me so much different than how you treat our daughter" oh because you're a grown man and I'm not your mom. he shaped up but it took a lot of work and he did have to hit a bottom (and I held him accountable to that)
2026-05-29 19:44:03
35
Lisa Pizza Meatball :
I like this; I imagine a lot of people having resistance to detaching because it feels like punishing or “being a bitch” or being “transactional;” can you reframe or talk more about that?
2026-05-29 21:33:17
10
user5702165659724 :
I did it. And it works. Take note ladies.
2026-05-29 20:28:45
13
mshermdesta :
What happens if you’ve comply detached and he’s still not doing anything?
2026-05-29 22:25:11
4
Forest Otrovert :
Yeah…this doesn’t actually feel good either. I don’t think I want to be in a relationship with someone who won’t change their behavior unless they experience extrinsic consequences for their actions. Dirty laundry. No dinner. No sex. That’s really all that I’m worth? That doesn’t feel like love to me. I’d rather be in a relationship with someone who wants to change out of intrinsic desire to be a good human.
2026-06-07 23:01:28
1
tomat0potat0 :
My husband is very nice and responsible but he’s definitely emotionally unavailable
2026-05-30 10:25:39
0
cooluser94 :
this will create a mother-husband dynamic
2026-06-16 09:41:16
0
iamsarahjane :
I wonder how many couples therapists have destroyed marriages with the approach of "understanding"...
2026-06-23 09:14:51
0
jessie.bo :
But when I’ve done that, his behavior gets worse?
2026-06-18 21:57:03
0
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