Devon
Region: US
Sunday 31 May 2026 02:35:51 GMT
61815
8316
112
377
Music
Download
Comments
AllieAimsss :
If anything, reminders that I’m NOT a child anymore…I’m an adult, who’s in control, and doesn’t have to be scared anymore, has been huge in my personal healing for BPD
2026-05-31 04:19:10
1113
leon :
'be cautious of the healing that is comfortable' is such a good way of putting it, great video as always
2026-05-31 13:02:44
453
keerstuh :
genuinely learned this year that this is WHY I wasn't getting better. wanting to be taken care of was only reopening the wound due to the reality that it will never actually replace what I lost. It just made the loss that much more apparent
2026-06-01 19:30:46
55
Ryan :
You just expanded the fuck out of my brain bro omg
2026-05-31 05:53:41
110
Gremlin :
If you’re interested in an alternative opinion, as someone who works in this space - I have my own feelings about the term ‘babied’ but there’s definitely times where someone who is autistic or has bpd may benefit from a really high level of support which may include support showering, eating etc. I think you’re right to say that’s not a sustainable way to live 24/7 or forever for most people but…a person can be functioning on that very low level for a few days when in crisis and then at a very high level when not in crisis. When not in crisis, it’s possible for them to return that level of support (albeit likely not in the same form hey) to their partner or other people in different ways. I think while emphasising the importance of not infantilising people, it’s also important that we do not consider needing support in these ways to be a form of infantilisation necessarily - it can be, and it can also not be. Clinicians who specialise in BPD bring a variety of perspectives and anecdotally, I’ve spoken to many who would actually offer the opinion that a stable romantic relationship with a high level of support/multiple ‘anchors’ i.e meaningful relationships that provide even ground can actually dramatically boost recovery - this is not to remove the agency or need for the person with bpd to do their own work, but to offer the perspective that this support can be a tool among many, even at such high levels, if used appropriately. I realise you reference some examples of support, but I’m emphasising that higher levels than we code as ‘normal’ can also be beneficial, so long as it does not overly negatively impact the support giver and that it is mutual in some way.
2026-05-31 15:26:12
35
Manuela Antoinette Rodriguez :
I misheard u at first and heard vaping and I got really defensive
2026-06-01 19:13:50
21
ㅠ :
I liked your little character, so I made one for myself too.
2026-06-02 01:12:00
20
molly :
Omg I love this! It’s wild thinking that there was a time this would have triggered defensiveness in me. But I truly was at my worst when I was using the word “needs” for things that were just desires to compensate for what I didn’t get as a child and when others were infantilizing me but I thought it’s what I wanted and needed to “heal” my inner child. All it did was reinforce and perpetuate my abandonment wounds.
2026-05-31 17:28:56
50
Cali :
I've been trying to get my romantic partner to understand that justifying my behavior is bad and I do actually need to be held accountable for bad things I do and say. That I need to be treated like an adult who's messed up rather than a child and that's difficult because as a partner you do just want to do what's easy and comfortable instead of the truth which can be hard and your videos have been very helpful. Thank you Devon 🥰
2026-05-31 20:17:44
23
Harilux :
How do you turn this around though? I feel like I’m currently starved from that external validation since I am by myself most of the time, and despite that, I don’t seem to gain the strength to seek being able to regulate myself. Maybe my question feels dumb but how do you get to that point where you start prioritizing long term efficiency? Cause I only seem to have energy for bedrotting and therapy helps but I feel stuck
2026-05-31 13:32:35
14
Livya🩷 :
I have cptsd and idk the difference since a lot of people argue that it's the same but you put into words what I've been thinking for a while now
2026-05-31 13:45:07
11
valeria cardoso :
Does anyone know someone like Devon but for AVPD?
2026-05-31 04:27:51
3
😼 :
i prefer to take care of myself so i can be self reliant
2026-05-31 03:41:09
58
j :
The level of self awareness, self reflection and compassion you have is awe inspiring. This was such a incredibly thoughtful, well made video.
2026-05-31 19:37:11
13
Eli :
Y'know what? I needed to hear this it's like a part of my brain developed
2026-06-01 00:22:09
38
jay :
ah this is a really useful and thoughtful video, I'm not necessarily the target audience but it feels relevant to my struggles with c-ptsd and ocd. thankfully I'm at a point now where hearing this is mostly reassuring that I'm on roughly the right track with therapy and healing, but it's also a really important reminder
2026-05-31 23:18:18
7
cicionyx :
The Lizzie McGuire animation is top tier
2026-05-31 22:12:42
10
maria grace :
This is such an important thing and so well explained THANK YOU
2026-06-01 02:28:06
5
Samantha Bee :
The kindest thing I can do for my inner child is to be capable. I'll cheer myself on and hold my own hand but I have to keep it pushing whether I want to in the moment or not.
2026-06-01 00:17:53
8
Ishaa :
This was such an amazing read. Thanks!
2026-05-31 03:40:25
14
☄️Miranda ☄️ :
as someone who was diagnosed with bpd but also prior was diagnosed with epilepsy adhd and austim . I grew up knowing that I hated the people who would infantlize people with issues and it bother me heavily to this day . Adults are adult they can act like a child doesnt mean treat them like a child there a adult I find it disrespectful in fact it cause me anger when someone does it to me I get embarrassed and basically mad and then dissociate. ( mind you i know the adhd epilepsy and autism is likely why i have this feeling )that to me and I have bpd . Anyway im saying this because you have helped me with my healing journey and now im gonna be going to dbt . you advice has helped me grow . you're very wise in all you say.
2026-05-31 03:46:32
17
GuardianOfTheStair :
i weirdly get annoying at people praising me cuz I got so use to the treatment my brothers an mum gave me so when someone say "you did really good at x" i think too myself well anyone can do this
2026-05-31 21:58:36
5
PinkPulpito :
I am a baby tho, dying on this hill
2026-05-31 20:34:48
6
Patches :
I say this with love because I’m grateful for this information, but I’m also horrified, because my friend does everything you’ve said NOT to do to his spouse. His spouse whines and cries about consequences over their actions and he tries to shield them from the consequences/pacify the people they’ve hurt for them, they weaponize crying in front of him because they know he caves when people cry, they constantly demand validation about EVERYTHING from him and he happily gives it if it means they don’t cry or stonewall him, they refuse to talk to people when they’ve started a fight and make him do the talking for them, etc etc. I’ve known these 2 for almost 4 years now and I’ve seen zero improvement despite them supposedly doing DBT for 2 years. They still act the exact same around me and manipulate him as they did 4 years ago…and now I have no way how I’m supposed to bring up these concerns to him without him accusing me of “sabotaging” their marriage
2026-06-03 10:46:47
1
The_Creature :
I think there is a balance to this. Different people are on different stages of things, and judging one by another's standard may not always be the best. Sometimes, babying can be helpful. It can be a short-term solution or a bandaid, yes, but sometimes that's all you can have at the moment because you're not yet at the place where you can handle it differently. And there is certainly something to be said about indulging certain childhood impulses to heal. When we consider it from the place of healing and progress – those things are certainly only *steps* that will likely be outgrown or at least heavily changed as we get better, but that does not invalidate their potential benefits in the meantime. If it gets you out of bed in the moment and when you're in a better state you put in effort to get better and have inner change (and such work *is* much better done in a very relaxed, non-stressed, non-depressive, non-triggered state), then getting infantilized for a moment (if that's what it takes) is just a good enough tool. Boundaries and awareness are necessary, of course. It's the difference in intentionality – just how processing and ruminating can *appear* very similar but they are inherently very different.
2026-06-07 10:20:05
0
To see more videos from user @devonplaster, please go to the Tikwm
homepage.
