🎀 For as long as I can remember, I’ve dealt with identity issues. As an adult, I realize that it has a lot to do with my autism/ADHD, trauma/C-PTSD, bipolar disorder, PMOS (formally PCOS), societal standards and cultural pressure. When you struggle with who you ‘are’, you tend to struggle with things like: ‘what’ you are… what your purpose in this life is…………. I’ve always been sweet. Sometimes giving away that tenderness too freely… Always the person to wait for you to tie your shoe when walking in a group… Always the person maintaining eye contact with someone telling a story in a setting where others have grown distracted…… The person who will choose love over judgement…. Very- “Don’t worry, I’ll be your buddy. I’ll take care of you!!” vibes… a giver… kind…… Beautiful things that involve energy…. As I grow older, one of my traits that I cling onto the most is my softness…… Kryptonite to many egos, a soft landing for many hearts and a powerful force that can heal… I’m learning to not only maintain MY softness, but give it to MYSELF first. Struggling with your identity causes low self-esteem, dark spiraling, body dysmorphia, doubt, anxiety, loss of hope, overwhelm, underwhelm, self-harming behaviors and, ultimately, a feeling of loneliness I don’t wish on the most disturbed soul. My appearance, attempts at self-preservation and the masking I’ve learned to protect myself have led many people to create sooooo many narratives about me…. Some hurtful, some hilarious. As someone who struggles with being perceived, I’m learning to worry about ME and what I think about MYSELF…. I’m also starting to wonder whether everyone struggles with their identity a little bit… A lot of your identity is your confidence in yourself- whatever that is…. Over the years, as a Black/Brown woman, my confidence has been fluid. Some days I’m an absolute diva, and some days I don’t know why I even try. Where I am in life right now is focused on loving the woman who wakes up every morning and tries her best. SHE is a diva who may have her moments, but is beautiful and preciosa… That can be my identity: being a beautiful person- inside and out. Making small moments beautiful. Cooking food that is beautiful. Dancing in my apartment for hours, prancing around in my beautiful body…… When people say “Love yourself!”, it can sound like more of a challenge than encouragement when you feel lost. I am so gifted in seeing the growth potential in things… To me, everybody has the capacity to create change- no matter how small… Using that same hope on myself, I’m learning to forgive myself, protect myself, honor myself, praise myself, prepare myself and make my identity: Beautiful woman who does beautiful things in beautiful ways, making thoughtful and beautiful decisions to mold a beautiful life for her beautiful self. THAT is enough for me 🫂🤍 #beautiful #afrolatina #confidence #soft #softness - @multifacetedserenity