@sheisapaigeturner: Women shouldn’t have to ask for help when they share a home with their partner. Men are capable of sharing responsibility for the home, the kids, and the invisible work that keeps family life running. Partnership isn't about one person managing everything and delegating tasks to the other. It's about shared ownership. I posted this one year ago today, and judging by the conversations I'm still having, it feels just as relevant now. #mentalloadofmotherhood #mentalload #marriage #parenting #millennialmom

booklover!8 :

I'm so glad my husband doesn't act like a toddler waiting to be told what to do ..... he actually makes me feel like he carries more of the mental load sometimes... yes, I typically handle dinners and stuff. but he plans EVERY trip we take for sports (my daughter plays travel hockey). he handles every registration and contact with coaches. we both are present at every game (or almost. there's always one of us there but usually both). he handles 90%of her school stuff.

Grace :

My husband just accepted a new job at a new company (he carries the insurance in our family) before accepting he did all the research to make sure ALL our doctors took the new insurance, did all the research to find out which of the 3 plans the company offered would best suit our family, did all the work to sign everyone up and I didn’t have to tell him where our info was stored or remind him of anything the new cards just came in the mail and he called our pediatricians to get the insurance switched. That is sharing the mental load

Linds :

I’ll ask for help, but I do NOT want to explain it, or remind. The reminding is the mental load - I want to say it and forget it.

Sustainable Small Steps🇨🇦 :

my husband and kids forgot my birthday, then got angry with me because I didn't remind them

MKeen :

Told him I needed help to decrease my panic attack episodes…he gave me a detailed list (color coded even!) of how he already helps.

irene456mb :

I told my husband the other day how exhausted i am by packing lunches (it’s just one of the things that i have to keep track of). He could have easily said that he would take care of it tonight. Instead i got “the quicker you go do it the quicker it’s over.”

Bee :

Melody · Working Mom of 2 :

Louder for the people in the back!!!

Brittany Conrad Bowd :

Thank you for this video! I’ve been trying to explain to my husband why I don’t want to ask him to do things or make lists, it’s just another thing I have to do. I’m tired of being the household manager and being told my standards and expectations are too high.

bella :

why do I have to ask a million times?!!!!!!!

Aster 🇨🇦 :

My husband does so much but my biggest frustration is when there is something on his “to do list” and a week or so has gone by and he hasn’t done it and then I have to remind him. That just adds to my mental load. He could easily set reminders and to do list like I do but he doesn’t. But if I really want the thing to get done, it’s stuck in my mental space until he finally does it.

user3013537065739 :

Stay on their necks paige 🔥👏

Adele Bertram :

My kid are grown now but I wish you were around when I was going through it! He actually does more now when they were young?

Kate Pilarski :

15 seconds in - YES MAAM!!!!

Monique 💙💚 :

OMGGGG I feel this to my very core!!

julieraabartman :

So thankful my husband is 100% as vital to running of our home and our family as I am!

🇨🇦 Tugg 🇺🇦 :

I love this and your direct/friendly tone is perfect. I got tired of feeling like his mother.

lew :

👏👏👏👏 LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

Megan :

Your videos make me feel even more grateful to have such a wonderful husband! Contributes equally and always thinks ahead of what i might need or what would make my life easier. Even if i have to ask him for anything, he’ll jump on it, no questions asked 🙏 💗

Rachel’s 🌎 world 🗺️ :

Even if they ask me what they can do to help is better than not doing anything

TanyaMTorline ❌ :

THIS

JessyNewcomb :

K :

Do they have to ask their bosses everything they need to do at work? And if they did it wrong at their job, would their bosses “just be appreciative they did it”?

kim :

help implies it's your responsibility and they're doing you a favour you need to be grateful for.

anonymouscomment1234557 :

I’m having a terrible time at my (full time!!) job. It’s impacted significantly on my mental health. I told my husband I needed him to REALLY step up, and I didn’t have the capacity to manage him. So this week he did. And it’s an actually made my mental health worse, because what do you MEAN he could have been doing this the whole time?! I told him this is the new normal