Corey 🇨🇦 :
When I was fortunate enough to go through the experience of being discarded six years ago not long after I had no choice but to block her, and to delete every single thing off of my phone that had anything to do with her and to get rid of anything in my apartment that reminded me of her, it wasn’t something I couldn’t not do because of the pain that I was in, my nervous system like needed me to, there’s something about it that allowed me to feel a little bit safer. That whole experience turned me into a fearful avoidant. I’ve been terrified of her emotionally all this time, which is why I was surprised I was able to reconnect with her last August, and that went amazing at first and then it didn’t take long before I was living in a limbo that’s lasted until now. I’m more afraid of her now than I have ever been, emotionally speaking. It’s a crazy experience and very painful because I know that this is not because of a lack of love at all in fact it’s the opposite, and that’s why so much fear comes up for both of us because it wrecked us both when she left and she does not trust herself to not do it again and doesn’t trust herself to be responsible for how she treats another person within a relationship. Her triggers are extremely severe, like her being in the fetal position severe. I wish she could meet someone like you, because she’s never met another human being that understands her and knows what it’s like, and she’s done lots of therapy. I had to just pull my energy back, I had no choice, I can’t keep standing in the doorway, or holding the bridge up alone
2026-06-12 20:53:33