@mindbymaya: #relationshipadvice #attachmentstyle #avoidantattachment #Relationship #Love

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Monday 15 June 2026 23:49:06 GMT
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sksli803
sksli803 :
avoid the avoidant
2026-06-16 02:44:42
599
d35haexx6
￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ ￴ :
As someone who used to have an avoidant attachment style and has healed, I want to say something to anyone who is struggling with it. Please don't lose yourself trying to save someone who isn't ready to heal. I know how overwhelming it feels. I know what it's like to want to shut down, to pull away, to avoid difficult conversations, and to convince yourself that distance is safer than vulnerability. I've been there. But I've also learned something that changed my life. No one else can heal you. Your partner can support you. They can be patient with you. They can reassure you, encourage you, and stand beside you. But they cannot fight your fears for you. They cannot carry your trauma forever. They cannot keep sacrificing their own peace hoping that one day you'll finally choose to change. A relationship isn't where you go to be fixed. Your partner is not your therapist. They're not your emotional dumping ground. They're not responsible for carrying every wound you refuse to face. They're another human being with their own emotions, struggles, and limits. They deserve to be loved just as much as you do. I know this because I was once that avoidant person. Someone with an anxious attachment style came into my life. He was patient with me. He understood me more than anyone ever had. He guided me when I was scared and reminded me that I wasn't alone. But he never healed me. I did. The reason I changed wasn't because he begged me to stay. It wasn't because he chased me every time I pulled away. I changed because I loved him. I realized that if I truly loved him, I couldn't keep letting my fears become his burden. Every time I wanted to run away, I chose to stay. Every time my mind told me to shut down, I forced myself to communicate. Every time fear convinced me that leaving was easier, I reminded myself that real love isn't about choosing what's easy—it's about choosing what's right. Was it overwhelming? Absolutely. There were days when facing my fears felt impossible. There were moments when I wanted to go back to my old habits because they felt safe. Healing wasn't quick. It took years. It was uncomfortable, exhausting, and sometimes painful.(1
2026-06-27 12:54:48
15
alexdpadilla300
Alex :
Stepping on eggshells because the avoidant refuses therapy sounds exhausting
2026-06-16 18:35:18
226
waki.mattbanyama
idfc_a🫥 :
so basically, just wait... and wait... time and time again.. even if it feels like getting hurt
2026-06-27 02:17:04
193
kevinbrown418
Kev B :
Fellas don’t walk on egg shells and compromise your normal human needs for a girl that literally doesn’t care how you feel.
2026-06-16 22:20:35
107
secret_71538
Secret_acc_1234 :
I read all of these comments saying to avoid the avoidants and as an avoidant myself instead of getting defensive and saying that y’all have to try to save us I think to myself that we do not deserve love. We avoid love and hurt you. Maybe we are meant to be alone forever. But I also think that everyone deserves love. So the real question is are u willing as an avoidant to change with some help or we just can’t change and we are doomed for life?
2026-06-17 20:45:20
19
cdjames84
cdjames84 :
What avoidant girlfriends secretly need…is to heal. Quit avoiding healing and just expecting treatment around your avoidance. Be accountable and quit avoiding doing the work
2026-06-18 21:45:07
25
nick.r.va
Nick :
Don’t try and fix it avoidants don’t deserve it
2026-06-20 01:13:45
23
theyneese
theyneese :
but when they gonna understand anxious
2026-06-28 06:47:42
10
jeresuarez25
jeremiah suarez :
did all of these and still gt dumped though
2026-06-27 09:53:47
13
nbg.dt
NBGDT :
Y be predictable when avoidants are unpredictable 😂
2026-06-21 01:35:31
9
saintardo
Ardonit :
Not doing allat they dont deserve love leave them alone
2026-06-19 05:26:23
17
fatecreature
fatecreature :
Most avoidants don’t acknowledge that they’re avoidant and always want to change or address things. Honestly, the juice ain’t worth the squeeze
2026-06-18 16:16:04
11
colt_mags
Yoryl. :
avoidants are the worse
2026-06-17 12:16:44
15
jonathanwhat6
Overflow :
did all this and I got dumped dont fall for it
2026-07-07 18:05:21
12
cos_v2.0
C0S🃏 :
Stay away from them, guys
2026-06-17 18:37:57
29
dancowman692
dancowman :
Don’t date an avoidant
2026-06-17 20:56:31
28
pheonix1964
Phoenix1964 :
Avoidant is better than cling film 😳
2026-06-19 18:32:02
9
vanzzz2322
vanzzz2322 :
No thank you
2026-06-28 11:07:43
9
kaiya01__
Kaiya :
thissss
2026-06-18 23:54:43
9
theheck41
🥺🖕 :
Then who's gonna validate your emotions? if you only validate the avoidant one?
2026-06-18 01:47:57
15
mulenasdo
kampart :
Avoidant will only destroy you
2026-06-16 22:31:04
71
shxxrds
Boluprints💰 :
You just miss the feeling, not the person. Stop reopening wounds, you aren’t meant to forget someone and move on in a day, growth takes time.
2026-06-28 01:03:27
7
misfit_lo
￴￴￴ ￴￴ ￴ ￴￴￴ ￴￴ ￴ ￴￴ ￴￴￴ ￴￴ :
i did it all yet i still lost her this shit is not no avoidant bullshit stop giving toxic behavior a coping name
2026-07-14 14:13:49
9
angellodelgado3
angello delgado :
better to work on yourself than DEPEND on others expecting to embrace someone not willing to improve
2026-06-16 22:09:15
55
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