@drdeborahparenting: When a child is screaming at the table and the parent says, "You better quit that one more time," the child has been told what not to do, but they still have not been told what the behavior will cost. Children learn from outcomes, not warnings. State the expectation: "We use calm voices at the table." State the consequence: "If you choose to scream again, you will lose some of your free time later today." Then follow through immediately. No second warning. No countdown. No lecture. No emotional reaction. Self-control creates freedom. Lack of self-control reduces freedom. Not because you're angry. Not because you're trying to punish. Because every environment has standards. Children are not preparing for your house. They are preparing for the world. And the world gives greater freedom to people who can govern themselves. The amount of freedom a child receives is connected to the amount of self-control they demonstrate. #ParentingOS #ParentingCommunity #Parenting #ParentingTips #ParentCoach #PurposedParenting

Lone Wolf :

The bottom line is, they are just the reflection of their mother or caretaker. You can't fix them without fixing the parent.

LOHR :

Mireia Cabrera421 :

I agree to some extent. He doesn’t know time yet, so saying that you will lose some free time later today wouldn’t work. It has to be an immediate concern related to what’s happening

user7922086604312 :

No that would not work. My mom would say , stop screaming one time , and if we continue to scream , we got punished. She didn't say calm voices inside voices , she said , stop screaming.

user255748810943 :

Really!!!! Please

Lowercase911 :

Hange Zoe :) :

yeaaahhh…..this would not work in childcare. that’s sweet to

🌟 :

If I was clearly disregulated, screaming, and someone told me "we use calm voice at the table, if you chose to scream again, you will lose some free time" that would have just made it worse, focusing on behaviour is not helpful, actually understanding what's happening and support to regulate is helpful.

Karen Vitanza :

I think the particular child you showed here was too young for that kind of advice sounds good for somebody a lot older. That little person isn’t gonna understand any of that.

mosquitohawk🎯_adapt :

This young child is going to remember later in the day why they've lost free time??? Wouldn't you need a more immediate consequence?

James May :

💯

user2453805163342 :

P

Jeremiah Rios :

😳😳😳

pumpkin :

So true

Om S@ :

Thank you 🙏🏼

nannyalfie :

that's a build up of being spoilt

jitske.5 :

and what about "the window of tolerance" and co-regulation?

Traci Moreau Gothrea :

Hell nah!

jbddad :

Your advice is very dangerous

Phil :

People on here just love beating kids damn

iGuNpOwDeR_nLEAD :

Kid that age knows not to scream (or should, if parents have been parenting correctly). We're done with dinner. Time to go to bed. No more dinner, no dessert, no TV, straight to bed.

Jen :

Wack!!!