kiwi07025 :
I’m not diagnosed, but I know in some my deep level that I’m autistic. And my family… pff they’re awful. If something is different than they know or want see, it’s automatically a bad. I mean, my mom saw me struggling interacting with strangers and even closest, and she said I’m sick. She directly said “what’s you, autistic or something that you can’t order food?”🥺 and the worst, that she really meant, she actually believed her words and in her head means that I’m, her daughter, is different, and basically stupid! She doesn’t understand that she’s hurting me even when only my own thoughts about being confirmed (diagnosed) autism, sends me in some place in my head that, i don’t want to be different, I want be normal 😭😭 I know my mom is cruel, she doesn’t understand me. But how to explain her that in my level? How to tell her that I’m struggling and it’s painful but she DOESN’T give s**t about this? I’m so lonely in that, and sometimes i think i might be unreal, that “do I really exist?” and “should I continue or just give up”. Just my little hear me out in this comment. Thanks for reading 🤝
2026-06-19 20:36:54