@estherosaheni: Most of the “communities” you’ve joined in the last year are aren’t going to last. You just can’t see it yet. The launch was great. The first event sold out. The group chat was active for three weeks. Now it’s quiet, and everyone’s pretending it’s because summer is busy. It isn’t. It’s because no one designed the return paths. A return path is the structural reason someone comes back without having to decide to come back. There are three I’ve found in my research, and the strongest communities I’ve studied have all three: -Proximity: Close enough that showing up doesn’t require a plan. -Repetition: Same people, same place, same rhythm. The calendar does the work, not willpower. The more boring the cadence, the stronger the community. -Low stakes: Easy to enter. Easy to miss. Safe to show up tired, late, or quiet. If your community requires performance, it will burn out the people you most want to keep. I’ve spent the last six months hosting and also interviewing 40+ hosts running dinner clubs, run clubs, supper clubs, and salons across my city and beyond. The ones still standing in 3 years are building around these three things. The ones that will disappear will be missing at least one. I’m documenting all of it inside the network, the research, the audits, the templates, and the conversations with the women building the most durable rooms in their cities. If you host the dinner, the run, the book club, the founders circle, the Host Network sign-ups are open. Link in bio. If you want more of this research as it comes out, follow along. There’s a lot more coming. #Community #incurableoptimist #belonging #socialclub #adultfriendships

Esther | Community & Belonging

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Monday 22 June 2026 00:25:43 GMT