@ameliasahm03: ok so nobody actually prepared me for the first month home and i genuinely think about this all the time bc i was SO focused on the birth and then i got home and i was like wait. WAIT. what do i do now. the hospital sends you home with this tiny human and a pamphlet and just kind of wishes you luck and i remember standing in my kitchen at like 2am holding my baby thinking i have never felt more alone in my entire life even tho my husband was literally in the next room asleep (must be nice btw) and like the thing nobody talks about is the grief?? i loved my baby so much it physically hurt but i also missed myself. i missed sleeping. i missed being a person with a name that wasn't "mom" or "her" or "the one who feeds him." and i felt SO guilty for feeling that way which made everything worse the nights were the hardest part for me. not because of the feeding or the diaper changes but just the loneliness of it. everyone else is asleep and ur just sitting there in the dark with your thoughts and this tiny baby who cannot help u at all lol. thats actually how i found Beacon, someone mentioned it in a comment and i downloaded it at like 3am one night and it shows u other moms who are literally awake right now going through the same thing and i cried bc i had been so convinced i was the only one struggling this hard if ur in your first month right now i just want u to know week 4 is not when u should have it together. nobody has it together at week 4. some people dont have it together at week 14 and thats also fine. ask for help before u hit the wall completely bc i promise u the wall is not fun and recovering from the wall takes longer than asking for help early ever would have u are doing so much better than u think 🤍 #mom #MomsofTikTok #momlife #baby #newborn
