@horse.love.sanctu: BIG JOHN NEVER LEFT US. That’s what it now feels like. I don’t know how to explain away all the coincidences with this colt and Big John. I don’t know what I believe. All I know is that this little colt feels as familiar as Big John. He listens and offers snuggles the same way. He escaped !! (Naughty) this morning just like Big John did if you go back and read the earlier years. Both Ally and my jaws dropped when our local security service said there was a baby horse with a very worried mama horse cavorting all around the neighborhood. Ahem. Just like the phone call five years ago we got when they said a very large draft horse was on the loose. Maybe this is just signs from Big J letting us know he’s alright. Maybe our grief is just looking for something to heal itself. Maybe it’s Big John back again. All I know is this little colt came along, prancing and dancing, and made what felt so broken and lost and hopeless start to heal… I look at him and the knife in my heart pulls back a little bit. I can catch my breath. So whether he’s a reincarnated Big John or a crazy manifestation of my intense grief— I am finally starting to heal. Ally plans to speak for herself in regard to this so I’ve been using “I” statements. Stay tuned for her own words.
