@myths_and_stories: okay owlbert, lemme get this straight. now, when you said you "don't like mondays" at your interview, you didn't mean it in a "workplace banter" kind of way; you really, REALLY meant it, right? and— if i'm parsing this correctly— when we asked you to come in for your new hire orientation this monday morning, you decided that your "fair and just retaliation" constituted destroying conference room 213B, as well as severely injuring your fellow new hires? now, now, owlbert, let me make one thing clear: i want to be on your side. i really do. but when you behave in such a manner as you did this morning, it makes it hard for me to do that. here at myths and stories, we try our best to lift up our compatriots, instead of putting them down— and how that manifests, is all up to... YOU. we hire superstars, yes... but more importantly, we hire TEAM PLAYERS; and if you're not ready to be a team player, then we have no choice but to let you go. i've spoken with HR and we've decided to put you on a month's probation, unpaid of course. after that you'll be working 32 hours instead of the normal 40. now, get home and think about what you've done. i'll see you next mon— i mean, next tuesday. (from xhs - id 7592529447)

homestucker :

can he stop please?

Homelander :

owlander

birxylll :

don't worry, I can just talk the owl out of this. he looks redeemable

Phantom 🇵🇸 :

what the fuck is going on

⃟ :

will school be cancelled

garfield155 :

littlebigplanet sound effect

Kelly "Pepto" Bismol :

is this real?

Escoba0070 :

god help us

MechaSUU :

the camera man is fine why isn't he doing anything???

mollie’s 2974th biggest glazer :

Is school canceled?

cupidsatellite🛸 :

does he do weddings?

Nothing here :

Tammy 🌴 :

📍 Folk Valley

Sebo :

national tragedy

🐾🇧🇬_REX_🇧🇬🦖 :

phonk bird 😭

unmanned_wall 7\ :

killka :

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David_cuz :

𖢘 :

Sir please stop

𝐋𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐞๑💫 :

this bro😭💔