Sometimes I think we loved each other better before we called it love. Back when there were no expectations. No unspoken rules. No fear of losing what we hadn’t even named yet. We were just… us. We talked for hours without wondering who texted first. We laughed without searching for hidden meanings. Silence never felt heavy. It was comfortable. It didn’t need to be filled. Friendship had something that our relationship slowly lost. Lightness. There was no pressure to be perfect. No constant fear of disappointing one another. No measuring of effort. No keeping score. We simply enjoyed each other’s company because that was enough. Then love arrived. And somehow, everything became more complicated. We started expecting instead of appreciating. Assuming instead of asking. Protecting our pride instead of protecting each other. The conversations became heavier. The misunderstandings lasted longer. The things we once laughed about slowly turned into arguments. It’s strange. I thought becoming lovers would mean becoming closer. Instead, somewhere along the way, we drifted further apart than we ever were as friends. Maybe because friendship teaches you to accept someone. Love sometimes tempts you to change them. To ask for more. To need more. To fear more. And fear has a way of ruining even the softest connections. Sometimes I miss the version of us that didn’t know what would happen next. The version that wasn’t trying to build forever. The version that simply existed in the moment. Back when hearing your voice was enough. Back when spending time together didn’t have to prove anything. Back when we weren’t trying so hard to make something last that we forgot how to enjoy it while it existed. I don’t think our relationship erased our friendship. I think it buried it beneath expectations we didn’t know how to carry. And that’s what hurts. Not that I lost someone I loved. But that I also lost my favorite friend. The person I could tell anything to without rehearsing the words. The person who knew how to make ordinary days feel unforgettable. Maybe some people are meant to stay friends. Not because they can’t love each other. But because the purest version of their connection existed before love asked them to become something more. And sometimes, when I think about us, I don’t miss being together the most. I miss the days when we didn’t belong to each other— yet somehow, we were never closer. - @sqwissq