Cyyxshxhs :
I think the hardest part wasn't that you never liked me back. Looking back, I accepted that possibility a long time ago. What stayed with me was everything that happened after I told you I liked you. There was never a conversation about it. You never rejected me, but you never acknowledged it either. We simply carried on as if nothing had changed.
At first, I convinced myself that maybe silence was an answer on its own. Maybe I was expecting too much. Maybe bringing it up again would only make things awkward. So I stayed quiet too. We continued talking, sharing random conversations, laughing over things that probably seemed insignificant to you. Those moments felt so genuine that every time I thought I was finally moving forward, one conversation was enough to undo weeks or even months of progress. Parang isang normal na usap lang natin, bigla na naman akong mapapaisip kung mali ba talagang bitawan ka.
What makes it difficult to explain is that you never explicitly led me on, but you also never gave me the clarity that would have allowed me to leave with peace. I spent three years trying to understand what your silence meant, when the truth was that I was trying to find certainty in someone who never intended to give it.
As time passed, I realized I had developed a habit of defending you. Whenever someone questioned the way you treated me, I always had a reason ready. I told myself that maybe you were just naturally blunt, maybe your jokes weren't meant to hurt anyone, or maybe I was simply reading too much into your words. It took me a long time to realize that I was extending you more understanding than I was ever willing to give myself.
There were moments when I genuinely resented you. Not because you didn't choose me, but because of how casually you could say things that stayed with me long after you'd forgotten them. You probably never intended for your words to have that kind of impact, but intention and impact are rarely the same thing. Some of the comments you made, the insults disguised as jokes, and the way you brushed them aside made me question myself far more than I should have. For a while, I even convinced myself that I was simply to
2026-07-03 12:52:00