@opallauryn: I have never been so disgusted by a comment section in my life. Boundaries are one thing, callousness and victim blaming- are another. #breakup #relationships #domesticviolence #believesurvivors #rant

*Just_Me* :

I have a friend that went back. I’m still here for her, I know how hard it is to leave.

💙Carrie the Liberal💙 :

The police blamed me. They asked why I went back to him.

Jesse Dill :

This. From the outside, be calm and patient and supportive. Learn the situation, listen to them. Offer what you can sustain - a steady presence is worth more than a rush job or crash and burn. You are an assistant, not a savior and not a martyr. The person in danger needs to lead the process, and truly be as ready as they can be. When possible make a larger support circle, pooling skills & time. Use local resources if feasible. Try to be half-ready for their exit always - have a rough outline & know what needs more work. Yet expect circumstances will delay again and again. Some is the cycle of abuse, some is scarcity and risk, some is human doubts. Abuse destroys self-certainty, thrives on isolation and overwhelm, and offers illusions of improvements as bait to stay stuck. This is a sustained effort, not a simple fix. Treating it as simple often ends badly, including in violence. Be careful, be patient, be safe to trust.

dumpsterfire_vampire :

This is why I find it impossible to talk about it

Britt :

I’ve a DV survivor too Lady- sending you SO much love, hugs & strength 💜💜💜 I am SO proud of for leaving! 🫶🏻

tinkergnomad 🏳️‍🌈💜🆘❌ :

I've seen it clearly for a while, and I've been trying to leave for several years. I hate talking about it because there's always hateful comments. If I can't talk about my situation, how am I supposed to leave it?

ashley ashborn 🪐 :

Was married for 7 YEARS!!!!!!!!! I had no idea

Ally :

my judge told me why did I go back after 😭

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ :

Yes

claire rose🧚🏻 :

Speak on it!!! 👏

contrafiction :

thank youu

Elle :

Mme. Stone🏳️‍⚧️🏴‍☠️💅🎯 :

I'll pray to my male sky king and ask him about that

.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.0.1.2 :

Yes❤️

sconesandtea100 :

thank you!! like why is the burden on the person being victimized and hurt, save that energy for the person enacting cruelty and abuse?? it feels like victims can’t win—critiqued for staying, critiqued for leaving, critiqued for hurting, my god 😭

Natalie :

statistically it takes an average of 8 attempts before victims actually get away. it's crushing that so often that's from not having support 💓 thank you for calling attention to this!

kaciew331 :

when you're being financially, emotionally and psychologically abused leavind feels impossible.

BowieTheFrenchie :

DV victims are at the greatest risk when they are leaving or have just left. Even those of us who figure out it’s abuse also know the risks and it’s terrifying

JackiLynn26 :

They’re lucky they don’t know what it’s like to be actually abvsed. It is awful and complicated af. I’m so glad I got out after 12 years

ge0shrimp :

Yeah that comment about unaliving is easier than coming out and talking about it is somehow easier is definitely 💯 and the silence of it further distances the conversation that leads to a wholer solution🥹😭

Punkfemme :

It can be literally impossible to leave when financial abuse or disability is involved and the total lack of understanding or empathy is terrifying.

Endostrongxxx :

I did leave. I escaped. Those same friends who basically said leave him or leave me out of it, left ME after I left him. I was trying to heal and navigate this new life and get back on my feet and dealing with PTSD and I was now basically told “shut the fuck up about it and move on or leave me out of it” 🙃

marathonbroski :

I agree with everything you said. That being said I’m sure the people making that argument weren’t talking about victims of abuse

Esther Godfrey :

It’s the worst rhetoric ever, that saying trending is so horrifying, and just goes to show that nobody understands abuse!

꧁☬𝖌𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖙 ☬꧂ :

I was denied a job bc it would cause "drama".