@elly.psychologist: Every healthy relationship has conflict, that's completely normal, so the presence of tension alone was never the thing to worry about. What actually separates ordinary disagreement from something emotionally abusive comes down to what happens underneath it and after it. The first is whether there's a genuine attempt to understand each other, versus a repeated pattern of dismissing how one person feels. Occasional friction is human, being consistently and repeatedly invalidated is what starts to tip into emotionally abusive territory, and it slowly erodes trust in your own perception. The second is accountability. In healthy conflict, both people can eventually recognise their part, even if it's not perfect every time. In something emotionally abusive, one person almost never can, and the blame consistently lands on the other, every single time. The third, and often the easiest to notice in hindsight, is what the conversation leaves you with. Healthy conflict, even when it's uncomfortable, usually reaches somewhere, a shift, a compromise, some feeling of being heard. Something emotionally abusive tends to spiral instead, leaving you unable to even remember what the conversation was originally about, and walking away more confused and hesitant to bring anything up again. That hesitation is itself a signal, because these patterns are long-standing and only shift when the person responsible is genuinely willing to do the work of owning them Official accounts and resources: www.ellyanastasiades.com #emotionallyabusiverelationship #relationshipabuse #emotionalabuse #relationshiptok #toxicrelationship

Elly | Counseling Psychologist

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Wednesday 15 July 2026 17:55:00 GMT