final_countdown_612 :
yes I was very good to all of them, thats what breaks my heart so much. it kills me. Yes they do now, very insecure, but wasn't B4 all this shit. I've always been intuitive but now... I'm fukin wide ass awake, so that's the only thing I'd thank these ppl for! there's absolutely no reason to fear me UNLESS ur pulling fukery, I always know... but I have always made it very clear to anyone who comes in my life, there's not much that gets by me, and I don't ask a question I don't usually already know the answer to, but I want them to either show their responsibility or be honest- ask my kids, they couldn't get anything over me growing up, or even now! I knew immediately like to the min that they were involved, and I allowed it for a min B4 speaking up, to validate my thoughts, of course they denied to this day, but to this day I know better and so do they!! And I've made it very clear the ppl who can reach out to me, they choose not to, and that's ok, I don't need their excuse, would've like to have that convo, but I already know and have known, gave way to many chances to clear it up and start over, but they came at me harder and harder, so that's their karma. it's been extremely hard to except it for the ones I TRULY LOVE, I made a promise to 1 that I will always be a friend and be there for them, we saved each other life, and I'm still good on my promise, and always will be- and that won't ever change, even thou i know what I know. that's their guilt to live with, but I won't allow them access to me personal space ever again. they made that choice for me, it's been extremely hurtful and emotional, and cut so fukin deep, bc the 3 ppl I NEVER EVER EVER expected this from, hurt me the most. And 1 of them, has caused me some serious self reflection and maybe some PTSD, and soooo much sadness, heartache, deep pain. I'm starting to heal from it, but it still hurts so badly. 😭
2026-07-15 20:08:24