@deadsoul.cc: I don't even know what to write anymore. I'm so tired, even though I'm doing absolutely nothing. I guess I'm just mentally exhausted. I have no desire, no motivation. I don't think there's any hope left for me or any future that's worth looking forward to. I don't even have the strength or motivation to play the games I bought anymore. I feel heavy, but also empty. I feel everything, yet at the same time, nothing. I don't understand myself or even know what I'm feeling anymore. Sometimes, I just wish I could leave this world peacefully... without feeling pain... and be reborn as someone much better than who I am now. I don't want to sleep, but I don't want to wake up either. I isolate myself from my friends. I don't know what's wrong with me. Most likely, a lot of things—but I can't fix them. I'm too weak to fight any of this. Besides... what's the point of it all? It feels completely pointless. There will always be someone better than me, so I feel useless. I hate my life. I wish I could fall asleep and wake up one day in the body of a girl, like I've always dreamed of. But of course, that's never going to happen. I will always be trapped. I will always be a prisoner. I will always be only what others want to see. I also hate the people in my country. Someone hurt my cat badly enough that someone random has took him to the vet immediately. My dear, cute friend didn't deserve that. I hate all of this so much. But I have no choice. I have to live. I have to exist. Whether I want to or not. And I'm so sorry sorry that you always have to comfort me. It makes me feel guilty. I feel like you deserve a lot better, and I exactly know that. Photography is probably the last thing that gives me any joy. But this is no longer as effective as it used to be. I don't have the strength to go outside. #digitalcamera #communityreal #nature #nostalgia 『 #deadsoulcc 』

. :

This feeling of emptiness will never go away

☢︎︎𝐉𝐞𝐲𝐅𝐥𝐲☢︎︎ :

Every month maybe i have a dream where i have a girlfriend and its the only time i feel pure genuine love and it feels so real but then i wake up and realize she wasn’t real and i don’t even remember her name and it was all a dream and i start violently sobbing into my pillow until i fall back asleep

ether_bluecat :

I’m so sorry for your cat but I’d also like to let you know that this post has made me feel a bit better about myself as I’m feeling the same way. It’s reassuring to know I’m not the only one:)

꒰ঌCarti໒꒱ :

I want to be reborn as a fawn with big beautiful angel wings. I think about that a lot

aya ׅ ͚♡ :

im so sorry to hear what has happened to your cat and everything else that's happening, I can't really help but please remember that us your viewers do care for you a lot and you can always vent in this as this is YOUR digital diary, it doesn't have to be only in the captions of videos you can do it with random pictures you have taken if you don't have any videos to write a caption on. We care for you deadsoulcc and we believe you can get through this! 🤍

temporary :

Life throws so many challenges our way to test us, doesn't it? Feeling physically and mentally exhausted is completely normal, even when you haven't faced any massive hardships yet. You aren't overreacting at all, you are simply tired of this boredom and lack of hope. Everyone's capacity to endure is different, and you are not weak. Feeling empty is just a reaction to looking at life through a dull, lifeless lens, but you can always change your perspective, it’s not as permanent as you think. Exhaustion makes even the simplest things feel like climbing a mountain. But you know what? You say you lack the energy and motivation to do anything, yet you are still enjoying the peaceful moments of life. You are still breathing, still perceiving, and still noticing the quiet warmth of nature. You managed to capture that simple, yet serene atmosphere. The present might feel terrible and hopeless, but no one can predict the future with absolute certainty. You can still make changes starting right now, and your future will eventually take a new turn. Feel free to rest if you're not feeling well, and stand up by your own when you are ready. Fill that emptiness with joy and positive energy from those very first simple steps, and you will get back in the race toward better things. You are just temporarily hidden behind thick clouds, once they clear up, you will shine with all your might, believe me. Please take kind care of yourself, and prove to life that this empty feeling hasn't made you give up yet. Keep moving forward with freedom and a smile on your face. I believe in you🤍

maiorfadeyounglixo :

I don’t know what I could say to comfort you aside from just spiting cheerful words I just wanted you to know that people care for you even if it’s a stranger online or even your cat and I dont know what is like to not have the motivation but I wish I could know just to at least try to comfort you and you are going to make it happen sooner or later you are going to bypass this

ritsu :

i’m so sorry for your cat. i really hope it gets well soon. and i hope you feel much better soon aswell! much support💕

hallodeniz :

Life is complicated, I don’t want to solve any of it. Stay strong friend, we are surviving this time

🎋l🍒vio :

Hey twin, firstly I’m really sorry for your cat, he really didn’t deserved that :( I hope that he’s going to be alright soon. And it might seem hopeless and pointless right now but I promise you that you deserve to live ! I know it’s hard to live through that phase where you feel empty yet you feel everything at once because I already had that but trust me don’t give up because it’ll get better in the future :) You don’t have to fix everything right now, do little steps by little steps and if you don’t feel it well just rest ! Nobody will judge you for that :) And remember that you always have support and you can lean on me or your community in case you need ;) And don’t feel guilty if we comfort you, it’s us who choose it because we want to, so don’t feel guilty about it. Take care twin and remember that you’re not the only one going through this phase :) !

⃟ :

So beautifull ❤️

♰ :

real.

ابو اليابان}{アブー・アル＝ヤバーン :

الترياق العجيب دمعة الاكتئاب_دمعة السعادة

. :

￴ :

@￴ I'm sorry for keeping you waiting... I will finally try to answer tomorrow, i promise