Ell | Cultivating Bold Spaces
Region: GB
Friday 24 July 2026 08:39:55 GMT
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Silika 🏒 :
i feel it’s obvious that it’s homophobia, but you provided a more nuanced perspective towards the discourse
2026-07-24 11:11:52
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Ivo🧚 :
I think identifying something as a -phobia or -ism is part 1. I think a lot of people are used to stopping there. What you’re getting at is essentially what makes the -phobia or -ism so appealing. Which can then expose the mechanism and systems that could do with some change.
2026-07-24 09:47:02
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Sean Povey :
As a bi/pan man, I totally understood what you were getting at, and didn't think you were downplaying homophobia 😅🤷♂️understanding is not the same as excusing or justifying
2026-07-24 10:08:53
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Ali :
I thought you articulated it really well and like yourself I thought its an obvious connection between hetereonormaivity and homophobia, like those are so woven and linked.
2026-07-24 08:52:25
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Saulio :
It’s about their own identify and role within the dynamic of the sexual relationship that they feel their partner being bisexual could affect. Is a feminine male transphobic if they don’t want a partner who has past relationships with trans women? Past sexual behaviours and roles give people indication of how they will be treated. How many men will feel fine with their partner taking on dominant roles within lesbian relationships? That dominance will likely show up in their relationship, so it’s about avoiding a partner that doesn’t match their needs, if a man wants to be the dominant protector and provider to a woman in and out of the bedroom. Let’s not label the whole population as homophobes
2026-07-25 03:38:52
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Lav :
Im kind of responding more to your original video than this one, but it doesn't seem to me that focusing exclusively roots of one's perception of the value of feminity in homophic beliefs it feels as though you've elided the more common motivation that is basal distaste for gay sexuality. I think most women who wouldn't date a bi man is more likely to simply think that a man having sex with a man is gross and reflects poorly on both parties, and particularly if he is bottoming. That seems much more prescient than the nuance of whether he values a relationship for her feminity and his perception thereof.
2026-07-24 23:26:35
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Rich :
I came from the last video. I follow you so I know that you are trustworthy & I understand you were exploring the deeper psychology of biphobia. However, if that was the first video of yours I'd ever come across I'd have made assumptions too. If you had said point blank "these are homophobic/biphobic ideals," during the video I think there would have been less confusion.
2026-07-24 15:21:49
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Lyra :
Homophobia in part exists bc of patriarchal and white supremacist structures you’re right and this person is being incredibly reductive. A lot of forms of oppression don’t work on their own they’re LINKED
2026-07-24 08:45:09
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Ellis Abe :
I think part of the issue is that a lot of people are denying that its homophobia even while describing the disgust they feel towards men who are attracted to or who have been with men. So, when they see you talking about nuance, they project onto you the idea that you are denying the homophobia.
2026-07-24 14:25:38
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Mx.Stellar🇵🇷🇵🇸 :
white supremacy & patriarchy lead to racism, heteronormativity, and homophobia. all these things intersect. it's simple yet complex. I think it's easier to call out homophobia over heteronormativity because it's a more well known concept.
2026-07-27 16:24:19
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ETP 🇨🇦 📚 :
I liked the first video and I agreed with it (as a bi who dated mostly other bi people). I have noticed the need to caveat everything is something that is bleeding into media and it’s making it worse.
2026-07-24 20:26:30
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JJDrake01 :
People are really so dumb nowadays
2026-07-25 16:38:10
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✨𝗖𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘀 :
It's always surprising what you have to spell out on the internet because yes I agree it was obvious too and I didn't think it needed mentioning but apparently it did 🙃
2026-07-24 16:24:21
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Airheaded Aviator :
I can see why there is rejection to your points. Cause while elements of heteronormativity can play into woman's hesitancy to date Bi-men on account of their view of themselves, the phrasing holds implications that its a primary cause. I know that you don't intend for that to be your point. Some viewers may here your nuanced exploration and feel you're giving an out or sympathetic view to homophobic women, or suggest that hate towards bi-men doesn't include the commonly seem illogical rejection of anything different. Some in the audience probably weren't primed for the avenue you were going down
2026-07-24 11:36:57
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whereisud :
people have gotten too used to creators having to put 50 second disclaimers at the start of their videos done to avoid the backlash as a result of all the possible miscomprehensions for what is not explicitly said. such a sad part of engaging in online discourse
2026-07-24 10:08:32
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Oprahnotwinfreyyy :
Tbh I love how you articulated it very fair and nuanced, most people say takes with such a narrow mindset that they tend to forget to add nuance to it which is VERY important as it explains more of the why and the root cause of it rather than just the shallow aspect of it
2026-07-26 19:30:06
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Clinton Ulfae :
I often feel we've lost all nuance and reduced ourselves to playing tennis with hot takes and slogans without ever really understanding topics in any real depth
2026-07-24 15:40:58
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Bob :
also impossible cause you never miss duckie 🤟
2026-07-24 19:14:36
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BiPaganMan :
This is exactly why I hate the "biphobia is just homophobia" talking point, it's just used to stop us from talking about our issues
2026-07-24 16:09:51
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custard070 :
Your videos easy to understand idk how people are misunderstanding
2026-07-24 16:05:56
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Harrison :
as a bi man I I instantly recognized the connection ,though that may be because of practical dating experience.
2026-07-26 14:11:41
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Dan :
why do people think homophobia is a thing? it's because queer identity threatens patriarchal gender and power structures. some theorists even think that's why men tend to be more transphobic - because they have more to lose from the disruption of this power structure
2026-07-26 13:44:39
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DataDyne :
It’s not *exactly* homophobia (which as a term it’s excessively broad), but it’s convenient to label it as such, cause it reduces the dimensionality of the issue. Which is both historical, systematic and gender role, race representation, dating culture and much more. Due to convenience, lack of interest in going deeper on their own understanding (as you say on the video) invites people to minimize.
2026-07-24 20:18:31
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Crassbutright :
people really can't understand that too things can't be true. no one understands the practical applications of the topics. just the buzz words
2026-07-26 09:42:20
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roadjcat :
I think it took me a little bit of the way through the video to map out how you *felt* about the kind of phenomenon you were explaining. But I felt it became clear by the end of the video.
2026-07-24 09:04:48
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