@andrewtoworld: #stitch with @lauren Why #conservative men are attracted to non-conservative women, speaking as someone who grew up around purity culture. #andrxw1165 #sociology #feminism
Quote from Trevor Noah's memoir:
"The way my mother always explained it, the traditional man wants a woman to be subservient, but he never falls in love with subservient women. He's attracted to independent women. 'He's like an exotic bird collector,' she said. 'He only wants a woman who is free because his dream is to put her in a cage.'"
2026-07-28 17:03:23
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a :
lowk its rape culture, they want what doesnt want them
2026-07-28 10:21:06
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rose :
I think it's also a fetishization of alternative women, they view being alt as a sexual thing instead
2026-07-28 00:12:02
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apollo 💙🧡 (boq’s boyfriend) :
I also feel like there’s a desire to “cage” free women. It’s not “fun” if a woman decides she wants to be traditional
2026-07-27 23:49:46
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Thebe97 :
Insane to think about how much of peoples politics is based around their shame of who they’re attracted to lmfao
2026-07-28 05:11:17
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eristys ampumarata :
i thought there was an element of "i can tame her"
2026-07-28 09:05:19
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tea girlie ☕ :
I've read a few books that have this plot of male protagonist having this very liberal girlfriend/wife. The way these stories were written always gave me an impression that conservative men have this fantasy of finding a wild and free woman and domesticating her, that this is where the romance is for them
2026-07-28 08:15:10
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AL :
There’s also the simple fact that women are more liberal on average, meaning these relationships are bound to happen even if everyone is trying to date within the in-group
2026-07-27 23:44:28
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Emerald :
They love that liberal women don’t expect traditional gender roles from them; they like enjoying the benefits of liberal ideology while keeping the benefits of conservatism for themselves
2026-07-31 08:18:34
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Spez :
Biggest flaw of purity culture is their unwillingness to educate on sex and bodily function
2026-07-28 00:08:42
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- :
very interesting but also infuriating
2026-07-28 06:14:30
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nel' :
in russia it's common for conservative men to fall for alt girls because it's associated with teenagers and they look younger to them and in a couple of months they try to change them, make them change their hair and makeup, take off their piercings and hide their tattoos 💀
2026-07-29 12:10:01
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Helen Rowlett :
finally a guy admitting feminism encourages women to work which is good for men because now they have a second income
2026-07-28 19:32:41
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Vienna :
I think there is also the component of her being free and they want to trap her. Like you see a pretty exotic bird and want to catch it.
2026-07-28 13:35:18
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⛥‧˚꒰ raya ୭ ˚ᵎᵎ ⛧ :
Every single guy ever: ‘you’re like super fun and we get along really well and have a great relationship but your not like, long term material’
2026-07-29 18:09:12
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Diana Alcala :
is NOT about love... is about control.
2026-07-28 17:08:19
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Huell Howser Fan Club :
there are some good articles written about this too! They want to conquer liberal women to control them :(
2026-07-27 23:49:54
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麻理 MARI :
they think women's politics are just hobbies and don't take them seriously, so it's not a problem for them that your values don't align
2026-07-29 19:57:09
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gobelwonker🇺🇦🇵🇸 :
i think a lot of men view "realtionships" and intercourse as a way to show dominance and humiliate their partner. they don't see it as a betrayel to their value to sleep with someone of different moral. they see it as a victory for them and a humiliation for the other.
2026-07-28 11:26:00
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Miruna Cojocaru263 :
Years ago I rejected a man who presented himself as highly conservative, family-oriented and religious. At that time it felt weird he would even bother trying to flirt, as my social media was signaling leftism from afar (nu 'buts' of 'ifs'). I moved on and forgot about the incident, until one day I was attending an LGBTQ party and saw his face in the stroboscopic lights. I kid you not, he was the DJ.
2026-07-28 13:31:02
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French Fries, Bitch :
I’d love to hear your take on Desi conservative men and their digital obsession with “baddies” (i.e. fierce, confident and unapologetic desi women) while derogating them during an in-person discussion.
2026-07-29 03:37:27
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alex :
the obsession pics are genius, another banger
2026-07-27 22:19:04
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Lunaspina :
They don’t. They just want to break you
2026-07-28 09:46:40
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Eleni :
Also, I would like to mention the role of fantasy, it truly gets a bit darker there. Sadly, there are stereotypes enforced by corn culture around alt women. The line between consent and power dynamics gets very very thin and you then get to see how inhumane they act towards these individuals, lacking respect, understanding, empathy of any type while at the same time viewing non alt women as entities to be respected. This is very scary and close to the Madonna whore complex. Having a gf or a family and at the same time desiring the “unknown” and challenging. Treating that challenging as inferior.
2026-07-28 22:20:35
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Tempestias :
I read this so that liberal, educated women are equal partners that have a personality and often a high-paying job. They also admit feellng desire, and are actively participating in thinking and deciding. The allure is understandable
2026-07-28 03:55:01
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