@quietfacelessmom: I did the maths again last night, lying awake next to her. If I go back full time: maybe two hours with her on a good weekday. Weekends where I'm too drained to actually be present, not just physically there. It's not sadness exactly. It's closer to a low, physical dread - the kind that sits in your chest and doesn't go away just because you tell yourself everyone does this. That's the exact gap I'm trying to close before December - not just financially, but so I'm not doing the 2am maths again next year. If you've done that same maths, at 2am or any other hour, you already know it doesn't need explaining. You know exactly which number kept you awake. Save this for the next time that maths creeps in. Follow @quietfacelessmom if you're in this exact gap too. Guide's in my bio if you want to see what I'm building to close it.

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