@oboe_parents: If you’re a parent and your kid is being defiant or rude, it’s extremely important to catch yourself LABELING. It’s tempting but it’s as easy as switching up a few words. Kids internalize what parents say and it can last a lifetime. By saying “you haven’t cleaned your room yet” instead of “you’re such a messy kid,” you are avoiding an extremely damaging self fulfilling prophecy on the kid side and a dangerous cognitive bias on your end. Oboe can help by providing research backed learning experiences on your EXACT situation unlike cookie cutter advice. Clip credit: Supernanny #parenting #parentingpsychology #parents #behavior #parentingteens

𝕮𝖆𝖘𝖘𝖊𝖗𝖔𝖑𝖊 𖤐 :

It’s literally just called a self fulfilling prophecy.

Pamela :

As a child psych this is so important…Literally the difference between a child experiencing guilt vs. experiencing shame for a behavioral mistake. Guilt-your behavior is bad vs. shame-YOU are bad 💕

Kayrockyrock :

Watching this makes me realize that even though I don't feel like a good mom sometimes, I actually am because I am infact taking the correct approach to parenting. And that's why my kid isn't an asshole and actually respects and listens to me. Yay. 🤘🥰

Catcorner :

I think many people overestimate how much nuance teens and kids pick up. For some, sure. But other will hear the label, carry it, and later have disagreements on what happened

dani :

Added to the list of why I don’t wanna have kids

MickieLore :

I have absolutely done this with my kids. This type of behavior from teens is pushing boundaries. etc. They're seeing what they can get away with and how we react. It's amazing how well "You're making yourself look stupid right now. YOU are making yourself look foolish. Prove us wrong."

milopengsiudai :

I feel like it comes down like a curse haha. Words have power.

Prettyash :

I think both approaches are negative. No one wants to be ordered around like that period. You attract more bees with honey and respecting others regardless of age and wether they are you’re children will get you a better result than demanding and rudely pushing someone into doing what you want

Joseph :

Perhaps in your own words and conclusions rather than AI?

Maggie :

I keep telling my nephew that he’s not making me look goofy, and that he is a a young man. He’s literally taller than me. Tantrums make him look silly not me.

BlobbyBlahBlah :

I was struggling with high school and my dad said and I quote, a fire hydrant could get a high school diploma 🙃 Spoiler alert, I never bothered to get a diploma. I'm in university NOW but I'm in my thirties and haven't talked to him I'm years. Never forgot those words. They matter.

Reuse Refuge :

Isn’t there something to her telling the child something vs Mom saying it? Sometimes I feel like I can say the “right words” and still not get results but if ANYONE else says the same thing the desired result happens. It’s like when a total stranger in the grocery store just interacts (positively or negatively) with your child while they’re having a hard time and immediately it disrupts the behavior.

Lavanya Farah428 :

It sounds like the same to me

🧿 Straw Hat Prin 🧿 :

clapping yes!!!! sooo critical for parenting AND self talk ( even for use grown ups)👏👏👏

Dorothy :

What do you type in to learn something like this? Just an example would be helpful thank you!

forbiddenconspiracies :

willie :

That’s bullshit

Paul :

so why is it you can see the difference when It comes to saying you are acting like a brat and when a man says a woman is acting like a bitch she automatically says are you calling me a bitch so why cant you notice the word acting but expect a child or parent too

sailormoon°•☆ :

it boils my piss when my mil says "are you going to be a good boy" to my son. he is good. he's 2. he's having a tantrum which is OKAY. he can't regulate like us adults. stfu

Christina :

😂😂😂