@litemindedtherapy: One of the hardest things to admit is that sometimes emotionally unavailable people feel more exciting because they allow you to stay in longing. There is always something to think about, decode, hope for or prove. The relationship becomes emotionally consuming before it has ever become emotionally close. Someone who is available takes away that familiar chase.. you are no longer trying to become “irresistible enough” to change their mind or special enough to be the exception. And without that struggle you may suddenly start to feel less certain of what you feel. Not because healthy connection is inherently boring, but because you have learned to recognize desire through distance. Availability also asks more of you than pursuit does. When someone is actually showing up, you can’t hide inside the fantasy of who they might become. You have to let them know the real you, tolerate being known over time, and decide whether you genuinely enjoy the person in front of you. That kind of closeness can feel quieter, slower and much more exposing. Sometimes the work isn’t forcing yourself to date people you feel nothing for. It’s becoming curious about whether you’ve confused emotional unpredictability with chemistry and whether peace feels empty simply because you haven’t learned how to live inside it yet. Looking to start therapy in NYC? We are accepting new clients virtually + in person. Book a free consult at link in bio 🔗 #emotionallyunavailaible #datingtips #anxiousattachment #relationaltrauma #therapytok @Kaleigh I NYC I Therapist
