Fatima Hammam :
I agree that we should seek Allah’s forgiveness, make dua, and place our trust in Him. But tawakkul doesn’t mean remaining passive while being mistreated. Allah has given us free will, intellect, and responsibility. Marriage in Islam is built on mutual kindness, respect, justice, and mercy. If a spouse repeatedly violates boundaries, is abusive, or refuses to fulfil their obligations, Islam doesn’t require the other spouse to simply wait for Allah to change them while enduring harm. We tie our camel and trust Allah. That means we pray, seek forgiveness, ask Allah for guidance, communicate, establish healthy boundaries, seek mediation when appropriate, and, if necessary, remove ourselves from situations of ongoing harm. Taking action isn’t a lack of faith, it’s part of the means Allah has provided. Surrendering to Allah means submitting to his guidance, not surrendering to another person’s wrongdoing. Patience (sabr) is a virtue we should all strive to practise, but wisdom is knowing when and how to exercise it. Not every situation calls for silent endurance.
If I’m living in a home where my husband is physically assaulting me, verbally abusing me, or repeatedly violating my rights, remaining there under the banner of “patience” is not what Islam teaches. Allah has given us intellect, discernment, and the responsibility to protect ourselves from harm. In my view, what is sometimes labelled as sabr or tawakkul can actually be fear, helplessness, or a misunderstanding of the religion. True tawakkul is trusting Allah while taking the lawful means he has given us. We make dua, seek forgiveness, establish boundaries, seek reconciliation where possible, and if the harm continues, we take action. Patience is enduring hardship while remaining obedient to Allah. It is not accepting ongoing oppression or enabling abuse. There is a profound difference between trusting Allah and tolerating injustice. I’m the biggest believer in surrendering our affairs, I’m a believer in what’s for you will not miss you, in choosing the path of least resistance and eliminating fear and having full Tawakul but with choice and action
2026-07-31 07:14:57