🐻🐾[ZNTS]🍂🍁 :
its honestly hard for me to keep friendships, I most of the time siendo myself in a fuctional world of me and my characters, when Im not imaginating anything I feel like im surrounded by dark black holes around me, and I hear things in my head, things I always say to myself ( "im sorry", "dont leave me with my mom again dad", "am I as stupid as she says?", etc ), I usually like being with my friendo because I dont have to imagine nothing when Im with them, I see them as flowers when I feel bad, beautiful flowers that make me feel safe, and when they are not in the modo or mad at smth I feel like its inmediatly my fault or that Im annoying them further and start feeling a deep void inside me like if its consuming, Im afriad of losing people I care too much of especiales my partner, he is everything keeping me afloat beside our friends... :(
2026-08-17 20:27:15