@thehealingpages07: 🌿 A Little Front-Porch Clarification This page was created to support estranged parents. That doesn’t mean estranged adult children aren’t welcome here—you are. Different perspectives are welcome, too. But showing up on a parent-support page just to shame, attack, diagnose, or argue with hurting parents ain’t “sharing another perspective.” That’s picking a fight on somebody else’s porch. Around here, we can disagree and still have manners. We can acknowledge that abuse and toxic parenting exist without assuming every estranged parent is abusive or deserved what happened. So pull up a chair if you’re here for respectful conversation. ❤️‍🩹🌿 But if you’re only here to throw rocks at the folks sitting on the porch, you might wanna mosey on down the road. This porch is staying safe for estranged parents. Period. 🖤

Hollis :

I was devastated when my husband of 22 years told me out of the blue he didn't love me anymore. He walked out of my life and left me to raise my 2 highschoolers alone with what he had done. There were times I did not handle it well. One went off to college last year and has not spoken to me since. The other one he encouraged to go live with a friend because he didn't want to pay any child support. His son from a previous marriage I took in at age 15-he is now 33. The two of them trash talk me so much, made up outright lies about me. Now both of my girls have me blocked and it's been an entire year. I was a damn good mother, drove them everywhere, never had a sitter, always volunteered when needed, the whole works. I can't make any sense of what my life is like now without them ir why they think it's okay. So, I had to sell the house and I moved down to the ocean all by myself. Just being an empty nester, and extremely happy with the divorce settlement. I'm lucky I don't have to work anymore and am set for life by coming into some unexpected money. What I woukd do to just have them call or text just to say hello. Everyone says they'll come back. I don't believe them. I have decided to move on with my life and know I raised them well enough that it was time for them to spread their wings and fly. Yet, my heart aches every single day.

user8512481010996 :

I am estranged too…the thing is tho, life has many stages and raising children is only one of them… once you are finished l, you still have the rest of your life to live… do it well, be kind to yourself even if your children are not… I am blessed to also have another child who has watched the abuse, has experienced it herself and who has a kind and loving husband who loves me too… they are willing and ready for me to come to them when I can no longer make it on my own… I am blessed… I will continue on alone until that day comes but until then I am going to live life to its fullest… 🙏🏼💙💙

Beth :

I’m opposite of a lot of parents. I chose to go on. I travel. Live my best life and hope my son is doing well. But never anticipate anything ever from him anymore. I choose peace. And a life filled with laughter and love from the huge family I have. He’s gone. And I don’t dwell. Doesn’t mean I don’t love him. I just love the boy I had. Not the man he became.

SeeingInColor :

I think we as parents need to change this epidemic! Live your life! Live how they are living !!! We too only get one chance at this world !

Grams :

9 years

Vinniesvault :

I recognize my part in that I didn’t transition well from her being a child to adult. I was still trying to parent her and making her feel angry and guilty, etc. but couldn’t she have just said “mom stop!” Instead I lost her and 2 grand children. It’s not a good reason to discard your parent but this generation seems to just rid themselves so easy of whatever makes them uncomfortable.

TellinYouHowItIs :

Do you all see that this is a trend? Us loving and safe parents are grieving our children who are still alive…… they threw us away like a piece of trash and we sit here heartbroken every second of every day wondering WHAT HAPPENED?? No explanation, no warnings, nothing except the land of unknowns…… so unbelievable. A living nightmare.💔💔💔💔💔

VirgoShmergo19 :

I don’t know if anyone is familiar with the group PEAK which stands for parents of estranged adult kids. I hooked up with them a few years ago and they have Zoom meetings and it was the best thing I ever did.

colhoueral :

I'm wondering what therapy is going to look like for these grand babies 15, 20 years from now. Knowing their parents deprived them of loving, supportive, banks of knowledge about their history, sleep-overs at Nana and Popas, vacations, memories, Christmas, birthdays, school programs, zoo trips.. I don't believe this trend will age well for our children. I was a good mother. I made mistakes, but nothing which merits this treatment. I love my grand baby with every fiber , and I can't touch him.

Valerie Dodge645 :

as an estranged child, my birth giver decided Disneyland was more important than being here for me during my cancer diagnosis and double mastectomy... my kids were always told I don't want anything to do with her with the way she just threw me away but they are more than welcomed to still have something to do with her. they noticed she quit calling for their birthdays and that's when I decided she's may have hurt me for 44 years but she won't hurt my kids anymore

tlm11669 :

it's just comforting to know I'm not alone ❤️

Jules :

It’s been 7 months for me. I don’t know what went wrong my daughter never said. She was my shadow my love my ride or die until one day out of the blue she’s gone. I don’t know how to continue on without her. I try my best but I just end up crying. Crying more than I ever have in my life. And life has been nothing but unkind to me

Rayne :

2 things can be true at the same time. 1. parents were doing the best they could in that moment and 2. children still deserved better. Yes as a parent you were probably doing the best you could during that season of your life and trying your hardest. its ok to admit that from both sides and see the other perspective. The problem is nobody wants to admit it from BOTH sides. Hopefully whatever your situation it works out.

Carolyn 🎭 :

cinneyhess1958 :

Almost 2 years, it’s so hard. He was my first born and we were so close. I supported him through his addiction and never gave up. He got clean and had a family and I was always there for them and then I voted and now I’m worthless and a horrible person who doesn’t deserve to see them ever again

MMP :

For my own well being I don’t chase I just moved on! I think of him almost daily and I sincerely hope he is living his best life! I am sad I’m not part of his life but it certainly wasn’t my choice!

musical mermaid :

thank you.

two bit :

🥹I didn’t know there were so many of us🥹

Elizabeth Ann :

I lost my son in 2019 my daughter couldn't deal with me so she just quit talking to me I not only lost a son I lost a daughter

Frogmom :

When you finally realize its not you, go enjoy your life cause I promise you they are enjoying there lives

Renae(Nae) :

Thanks for leaving the porch light on...glad to be here✨

Lois :

My babygirl turns 25 on Thursday. I miss her so much. Baby girl, I’m sorry I made you so angry

Judy L :

I have come to the conclusion that I did my best for my kids. Growing up I was the support they had in all of their activities at school and after. Not their dad. They choose to think I’m the bad person after our divorce. They were both grown when it happened. They never asked me what I dealt with, just turned on me. I’ve tried, so many times, tears, begging. No more. I asked God to see to it. I’m leaving it with Him. I’m going to continue to live my life. I can’t allow my kids to dictate how I do that. I am at peace with it.

Stomawarrior :

15 years now

mmd2008 :

stepparent here…doesn’t bother me at all, but kills me for my husband