The Pottymouth Guru
Region: CA
Wednesday 19 August 2026 18:21:37 GMT
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The Pottymouth Guru :
One thing I really want to emphasize: slow change still looks like change. Messy attempts count. Catching it after the fact counts. Repairing faster counts. Getting it right once out of ten when it used to be zero counts. But talking about change, understanding the pattern, or promising to work on it isn’t the same thing as actually being in a process of change. ❤️🤟🏻🌿
2026-08-19 18:22:07
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derekaw :
I am the anxious one, I thought he was the problem. I treated him like he was the problem. I think he felt like he was the problem. That’s a heavy load :-( I didn’t see this till recently. I stopped all my anxious relationship behaviours. I was running on fear, we both were. My mind, my life and my relationship are better.
2026-08-19 20:10:51
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Darkcloudbae :
Love this video. Do you have a video(s) on how to deal with shame wounds?
2026-08-20 13:42:44
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🇨🇦 taleof2tails 🇨🇦 :
Give me your eyeshadow colour… I must get
2026-08-30 00:50:50
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LisaBW1974🇺🇲 :
The youngest is starting her freshman year of h.s. Boundaries are being set around whataboutism & pulling out history to divert attention from current behavior. He has until graduation or the house will hit the market.
2026-08-20 10:39:12
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thereallsg :
really, can't I just do the work
2026-08-25 08:52:19
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!zzy 🌀 :
Your page is life changing, thank you for articulating this so beautifully!!
2026-09-03 07:20:56
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Hawleywood :
you are so enjoyable and thank-you for showing both sides
2026-09-03 12:35:52
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MMM :
What if you stop bringing up the difficult topics (anxious person her but recent capacity to regulate)?♥️
2026-08-21 11:57:29
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Michael Garner :
this...is...BRILLIANT! Wonderful explanation about trajectory vs potential! 👏👏👏
2026-08-20 12:24:12
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BoobyGrow :
I needed to hear this 🙏
2026-08-22 14:24:57
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Thin Air :
What perfect timing! I was just looking into how to work on these items (I got the wombo combo haha) and yes there do be a shame wound. Could you give more advice on dealing with the shame wound please?
2026-08-20 02:39:14
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Jeny Jeny :
Brilliant. Bravo!
2026-08-21 20:10:31
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user6317221743819 :
yeah. I think of it like weight lifting. you have the most control over your exercise. you have influence over your partners exercise - by example, by asking, by offering to help, by being disciplined yourself and hoping it rubs off. _ but ultimately they have to be willing to lift the weights themselves. that's the prerequisite for growing muscles. you can't do it for them. _ finding out about attachment theory was so helpful for me in understanding him. it no longer felt like this man, who was exceedingly competent in all other areas of life, might open up and communicate with me like an adult if I was just a litttttle more patient. understanding that this is who changed the equation. it was binary. you're willing to do thr work with me, or you're not. and i lost nothing by drawing that line because I didn't have him in the way I wanted him. _ and he didn't (couldn't? maybe it doesn't even matter) try therapy with me. that was it 🤷♀️confirmation he wasn't willing or able to try to be better. _ its tough though. he was otherwise near goddamn perfect for me. I couldn't think of any other flaws of his that weren't attachment related. I'd change literally nothing about him but this. separate from him, I'm so goddamn picky that when I meet someone I like and who ticks all the boxes its like "I'm flawed, and they deal with it. you also owe them patience and you can't expect your partner to be literally perfect". maybe i over corrected. maybe i was horny 😂 oh well.
2026-08-19 21:35:35
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